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“Your race is only as good as your debrief.”
I have heard this phrase more times than I can count from my leadership team. The idea that everything that I’m experiencing, the God things, the hard things, the blessing, and the adventures, they all need to be processed, debriefed, and reflected on. It’s through that reflection that the lessons that are being learned can sink in and take root, which is the point of learning lessons, right?
A week or two ago my squad hit the halfway point on our race. I am now closer to being home than I am to the beginning of this journey. This is something that both fills me with joy and sadness. If I’m being honest, I can’t imagine being back at home right now. I think I’m scared to fall back into old patterns, and to be seen as someone who I’m not anymore. I feel like I have so much left to learn, and I don’t want this adventure with Jesus to be over. But at the same time, I can’t wait to go home. I can’t wait to see everyone that I love, and to be in their lives, and to go to the same church every week and for it to be in English. I can’t wait to see my cats and to drive a car, I can’t wait to not live out of a backpack anymore.
These past few months have felt like a lifetime. The Morgan who left home 6 months ago feels like a different person that who is writing this now, and that is both amazing and scary to think about.
So, in the spirit of processing, I wanted to walk through a little bit about what each month has been like and share that with you. There is no way that I can fully summarize or explain everything. There is just too much. But, while reflecting on each month, one theme, or word, has stuck out to me, and that is what I want to share that with you.
Ukraine: Perspective
Ukraine was a lonely month and a month where I realized that this was going to be a challenging journey. I got to go to God and cry out to Him in a place so removed from everything and everyone I knew. It was a month of deconstructing things in my life that don’t bring me closer to the Lord, and of seeing things with new eyes- or at least trying to.
Romania: Stretch
Romania was really hard. This month my whole squad was together, which I loved, but I also struggled a ton. The ministry in Romania was outside of my comfort zone and it pushed me. It was hard and challenging, and I wish I could say that by the end I loved it, but that would be a lie. I was so relieved with this month ended. This was a month of baby steps and trust, and I learned a lot living outside of my comfort zone.
Bulgaria: Intentional/Trust
I think that Bulgaria might have been the best month of growth that I’ve had so far on the race (Ok, maybe it’s tied with Cambodia- TBD). I was able to take time and go away with the Lord. I saw my prayer life flourish and I learned more of what it means to walk in submission. This was a month of walking in trust. Trusting God, trusting my team, trusting the process, just trusting. This was also the first month that I could see fruits of change budding up and it was so so encouraging.
Vietnam: Gift
Everything about Vietnam was a gift. Europe was hard and cold (so cold) and I struggled. Vietnam felt like home instantly. Vietnam was an answered prayer. Everything I did, everywhere I went, everything I saw, it all was a gift. I got to see the Lord’s heart for me in Vietnam in a new way. I got to see how well He knows me and how much He loves me. My team received our ministry assignment because of me- so that I specifically could work with the Deaf community and it was magical. I was so loved by my team this month and I got to meet such sweet people and build incredible friendships that have lasted beyond this month. (This has been my favorite month so far, hands down.)
Cambodia: Rest
Time stopped in Cambodia… a lot of things stopped actually. I experienced amazing healing and growth this month and the Lord invited me to rest with Him, which isn’t something that I had ever done before. This was the least comfortable month when it came to how we were living, yet I felt more rested this month than any other. (and let me just tell you, it def wasn’t because I was sleeping enough or anything like that- no sir.) God showed me that He loved me for me, and that there was nothing that I could do to change that.
Thailand: TO BE DETERMINED
Thailand has been a lot of things so far. Disappointing, surprising, happy, exciting, restful, challenging, and everything else. It’s growing on me- but I’ll tell you more about it later.
Debriefing doesn’t always have to be heavy and serious, or just a focus on what was hard, or what went wrong. Debriefing the fun things reminds us about God’s character and how He loves fun too. Below I have included some never before seen photos that remind me of the joy that I’ve felt in each place that I have been. (This is also the only photo that I have consistently taken in every country. Why? I don’t know. But I enjoy them.)
Ukraine:
Romania:
Bulgaria:
Vietnam:
Cambodia:
BONUS!!!
Thailand:
Greece:
I love you guys, thank you for coming on this journey with me. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I am so reminded of how loved I am by you.
Much love,
Morgan
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