!!Quick Update!!
Current Location: Kampot Province, Cambodia
Ministry for Month 5: Teaching English and the Word, door-to-door evangelism,
and spending time with children
Percent Funded: 79.86%
Final Deadline: 13 days ago…
Why is there a picture of me staring off into space in my sleeping bag? I’ll tell you, but first, I will ask you a question. Do you ever find yourself feeling……detached? Like everything around you isn’t really happening, or at least isn’t happening to you? You are experiencing it, yes. But are you truly living it?
A phrase that gets thrown around a lot on the race is, “Your experience is only as good as your debrief.” Life can get hectic. Between work, school, family, friends, church, hobbies, late nights, early mornings, and trying to find time to study the word and pray, I often find myself feeling like I’m always just trying to catch up. There is this mythical version of myself that is on top of everything: all the boxes on the to-do list are checked, all my spaces are organized, I keep up with all my friends, and I spend all my money responsibly.
I am not this person.
My to-do list is filled with scratched out chores that I never got around to and no longer matter. I know where all my things are, but it’s far from organized. Half my friends and family probably think I forgot they exist…
On the world race, there is a whole new string of challenges. At the beginning of each month, you don’t know where anything is: the nearest coffee shop with wifi, the market, groceries, etc. You start a new ministry where you are trying to learn new names, new faces, and a few scraps of the local language to get by when no one knows English. You are asked to blog weekly (I only manage every three weeks or so). My personal money that’s aside from what I’ve fundraised is in a Charles Schwab account, (a great bank for travelers that refunds ATM fees, which add up quick) and it always seems to be empty when I need it, and it takes 4 days to move money over (venmo + teammates to the rescue).
In the midst of this, I have an amazing gift from Jesus: the opportunity to minister to His church, grow His Kingdom, and bring more brothers and sisters into the body of Christ each month. This can be a super rewarding and growing experience. OR, it can become an exhausting chore when you are burned out, exhausted, and don’t feel like leaving your bed (or your cot/sleeping bag/tent, dorm, whatever roll of the dice you got that month).
So, what makes the difference between these two very different mindsets? Because really, that’s all they are: two very different ways of seeing the same experience.
Your experience is only as good as your debrief.
“What exactly does that mean” you say? Glad you asked 🙂
Webster’s Dictionary defines debrief as “to carefully review a task upon completion.” It is looking back over the last few days, weeks, month, and thinking over and processing what happened.
This last month, I was serving at a daycare/orphanage in Vietnam. After a morning filled with sanding and painting, I was in my bed thinking about what to teach for an english class that evening and I found myself feeling sort of detached from it all. Rather than truly experiencing what was going on, I was sort of just coasting, it didn’t feel real. I am a bit of a verbal processor, so I thought maybe if I just start talking about what was going on, I could somehow ground myself a bit. So, in my empty room, just me wrapped in my sleeping bag atop an old spring mattress, I started talking.
“My name is Matthew Alexander, and I am 4 months into a crazy mission trip, the world race. I am currently blessed to be laying in a bed, with AC, in Ho Chi Minh, Vietnam. I’m like 9,000 miles from home! God, thank you for sweeping me into a story as crazy as this.” From there, I started thanking God for everything He was blessing me with in that moment. I had an amazing team of people that loved God, and we got to wake up every day and spend it serving an amazing ministry in a country where it’s illegal to talk about Jesus. How crazy it that?!
In all the busyness, all the work each day, and all the meaningless things I ended up worrying about or stressing over, I wasn’t taking the time to process what was going on around me. I’d forgotten how blessed I was to even be on this trip, to be in Vietnam and serve along side my christian brothers and sisters that are being persecuted by their government and neighbors. I needed to take time to talk to God and process my life a bit, to ask both God and myself some hard questions.
Do you ever take time like that? If you haven’t lately, I really encourage you to take ONE minute; believe me, it’s worth it. Set down your fancy device for a moment, and just talk to God about how your day is going, how your life is right now. Be honest with Him. He knows it all already, but He is a good Father who loves hearing from His children. The best part is, this doesn’t have to be just a one way conversation, He wants to talk to you as well! Our busyness, our sin, all the things in life we end up spending all our time with instead of God, it makes our minds and hearts a noisy, confusing mess where it’s hard to hear His still, small vice. We are never separated from His love, but it is hard to hear Him when you have so many other things taking up the space that was originally designed to be inhabited by Him, our Abba. Just start the conversation, He’s paying attention.
STOP READING, DO IT 😉
If you already did, I’d like to take a moment to encourage you to make this a daily habit. God wants to spend time with you. He loves you, He cherishes you, He looks forward to the moment that you set aside everything else and spend time with Him. This is something I am trying to make a habit of myself. I usually read and pray at some point every day, but it can easily become mechanical for me, just a box to check on my to-do list. I need to slow down, breath, and ask God, “What would You like to talk about today? What would You like to teach me today? What do I need to process with You?”
Thank you so much for reading, I’ll be posting about my ministry in Cambodia and team changes (that’s right , i’m traveling with some new homies) soon!
A note about my fundraising:
Adventures In Missions is giving me some extra time to finish fundraising. Out of $18,100 I only have $3,645 left to go! Honestly, right now I’m waiting to hear back from my leadership team right to know exactly how long. Particularly in the beginning, I didn’t like fundraising, I felt a little guilty asking people for money and it was a point of stress for me. Honestly, it is still something I stress out about, but my general attitude toward it has changed a lot. I understand that by giving others the chance to support me, and am giving them the opportunity to sow into God’s Kingdom. The bible even talks about women who supported Jesus’ ministry “out of their own means” in Luke chapter 8. Paul was supported financially supported by the Philippians while he served in Corinth. I am no Paul, and I am certainly no Jesus, but I have given this year to God, away from work and a paycheck, away from using my degree, to just serve. I’m not even 100% sure what I will do for work when I get back. God has simply asked me to trust Him to provide for all my need: paying for this trip, for personal money on the trip (which I don’t have either) and for everything that comes after. To the world, what I’m doing makes no sense. To the world, God makes no sense. But for me, the only thing that makes sense in the in this world is to follow Him, to trust Him, wherever that takes me.
If you would like to support me financially in reaching out to people who have never heard the name of Jesus, you can hit the “Donate!” button at the top of this page. Even $5 makes a difference, covering all my food for a day. $11 covers that, as well as my lodging and local transportation (#11n11, go figure). $100 covers those expenses for 9 full days, $350 for an entire month. Every penny has an effect beyond what you can imagine! Thank you so much for all your prayers and support.
Another blog in the next few days! (Probably 
)
