It’s GO time. I have one more full day home and it’s launch or bust.
It’s after midnight. I’ve been lying here in bed willing my mind to shut off….. but just resigned myself to the fact that’s not happening anytime soon. Got up, grabbed my computer with the hopes of getting this out and making some room in my head for sleep 😉
I’ve been home in Florida the last two weeks visiting family. The fastest two weeks of my life. I knew that was going to happen, I was secretly hoping it wouldn’t. Time doesn’t slow down no matter how hard we want it to.
Every. Single. Part of me knows I’m ready to take this journey with God, with myself, and with my team and go out into the world and put my stamp on it, put HIS stamp on it. But in knowing how ready I am to just do this thing…. I really wanted to make sure I soaked in every bit of my time home and with my people, and I believe I did that well. And to my family, I hope they can look back and say I did it well.
The journey to getting to launch ….
I had to pause a moment and take a deep breath because I started crying; this season has wrecked me in the best of ways.
The journey to getting to this place, the day before launch, it’s been the most beautiful part of the whole process thus far. I want to put this time in a bottle and hold on to it for the rest of my life. It’s been a year of watching this amazing, beautiful, intricate, intimate, time of my life unfold. I’ve grown and learned so much about myself in just saying “Yes” and from the very moment I committed to this race. It was like the moment that one word came out of my mouth, I wasn’t just saying yes to spending a year overseas and visiting 11 different countries, it was like I was saying “Yes” to experiencing God in a whole new way and through a new lens.
Oh Lord, open my eyes that I may see that this is only just the beginning. These next 11 months are going to be a continuous dialogue with the Lord, and it’s ALWAYS going to start something like this…
“But wait Lauren, there’s more..”
I’m ready. Willing. Able.
It doesn’t stop here. This journey with him on earth continues till the day he calls me home, and even then that journey continues on into eternity spent with him.
But meanwhile let his Will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
And I’m here Lord saying “Give me more”….
So as the wheels are about to go up and my squad is bound for the Philippines. We covet your prayers for safe travels as we embark on month one.
Ahhhhhh, this is really happening.
This is not a drill.
Pinch me.
What is my life right now????
I think about the girl I’ve known my whole life and almost can’t help but mourn her in a sense. Because you see, the girl speaking to you right now will not be the same girl that comes back a year from now. I dont know what that’s going to look like but I do know she’ll be even better. So I say to this girl ….Go into this year with an open mind, open heart, and zero expectations and let go of your plan. Enjoy the ride, the people, cultures, simple life and the friends and experiences you make along the way. Give all of yourself but remember its important to be poured into as well so you have something to continuously give. Love boldy, fiercely and without hesitation. But above all, love yourself and give yourself grace for the journey!!
My next blog will be from the field. Get excited and buckle up because this is about to be a crazy beautiful year. Your love and support is what has gotten me through this year of preparation and going to carry me the whole way.
Much love to you all.
