First off, I want to say thank you to everyone who has been supporting me emotionally, finacially, and through prayer. I could not have made it this far without you.
I would be lying if I said fundraising and preparing for the world race doesn’t scare me. There is so much to be done and so much money to raise. I thank God everyday that I am right on track with where I am supposed to be. But just because I‘m on track doesn‘t mean I am confident in everything that needs to be done.
People ask me all the time how things are going with the world race and I answer with a smile and tell them about everything that God has done so far and all the future planning I have in mind. The conversations are good but I always walk away from them with a new weight of stress. Its one thing to have all of your plans in your head and written down, but to say them out loud is another.
I know that God has got me and that He will provide. But the question of “How?” still remains. I can have all my plans lined up and organized to perfection but if it does’t go along with God’s plan, it doesn‘t matter. He can do whatever he wants.
So often I see the stories of my world race squad mates and how some of them are way ahead of me or even fully funded. I can’t help myself to compare myself to them. I see squad mates raising money without a problem, going on vacations, who seem to be worry free about the world race. While I am trying to save every penny. I become so jealous of this.
Even worse than that, I’ll see squad mates who are behind or have barely anything raised, and all I can think in that moment is “Well, at least I’m not them.”
Without even reaslizing it I have turned what God is blessing us all with into a competition. I stopped seeing my squad mates as future missionaries I get the pleasure to serve with, and start seeing them as opponents.
It shouldn‘t me like this. It‘s not a competition.
These people are my friends and are on the same journey as me. When I see that one is succeeding I should prasie God, and when one struggles, I should pray to God that He provides.
I hope and pray that you join me on this journey. You may not be serving around the world with me in October, but what you can do is pray. Not only for me but for my squate mates as well. God is working through all of us. We all have our stuggles and victories, but in the end God is in control and wants the best for us all.
