Long time no see my friends! I’m back! Time is flying by and so much is happening. By this time next month, I’ll be eighteen years old and a high school graduate. It doesn’t seem real. Within the last several months, I have made a major realization: I don’t really understand grace. If I were asked, I could give an explanation; it isn’t head knowledge that I lack, but heart knowledge.
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith- and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God- not by works, so no one can boast.
Ephesians 2:8-9
Grace: The free and unmerited (undeserved) favor of God.
For my whole life, I’ve been a works kinda girl. I don’t like accepting things that I don’t feel like I’ve earned. When I receive gifts, I try to make it up to whoever gave them to me. For me, receiving doesn’t come naturally. In my works-based “Christianity”, I would constantly feel guilty whenever I messed up and sinned, and would live in that guilt for weeks or months or even years afterwards. For that time period after messing up, I would feel overwhelmed with condemnation, and avoid God. But this is not the life Jesus died to give me.
Trying to earn my way to heaven and beating myself up when I can’t, won’t work, because I will always be me: a sin-infested human. There is no possible way I can ever be good enough to deserve it. God is a God of grace, who is aware of our dirtiness, and still offers new life, peace, and unbelievable love. It is undeserved, and that’s what makes it so amazing. To anyone who this is resonating with, maybe stop trying to prove to God that you love Him, and let yourself believe and grasp how much He loves you! That’s when you start doing good works, for God’s glory, and out of His incredible love! This love, even though it is hard to understand, is real.
And if by grace, then it cannot be based on works; if it were, grace would no longer be grace.
Romans 11:6
Take some time to really think about this love and what it means. It is wild to think that God is pursuing you and me, that He wants us and so freely forgives us when we ask!
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:17-21
P.S. Hey there! My first $5,000 deadline is about a month from now, and I’ve raised $3,417. If you feel lead, please donate! Thank you so much!
