06/06/2019
I feel sad this morning. I already miss the world race and I’m still here. It’s crazy how much that feeling fluctuates.. Sometimes I am fine. I’m ready to say goodbye. I’m ready for the day I no longer live out of a backpack, scared of how heavy my pack will be if I purchase that big bottle of body wash. I’m ready for warm showers, dryers, dishwashers, and the privacy of my own room. I’m ready to feel the comfort of my own home, being able to live in a house with a real-life coffee maker (do they actually exist??) and enjoying that cup of coffee in my own full size BED.
But, I’m going to miss things of this life I have been living so much more.. How will I live without daily feedback and team time? Who is gonna tell me how I need to improve? Who is gonna tell me, “Jordan, you’re doing really great.” What about dinners as a team, or movie nights and popcorn that we finish before the movie even starts? What about those fun outings on the town, escaping from the little village we call home (if it’s not 4 hours from a city), wearing our best clothes (jeans, a t-shirt), pretending to be normal tourists for the day? What about Bible Studies, worship, intercession and heart-to-heart convos about how we miss home (or how we’re terrified to be back) at 2AM? What about all the times we’ve had to BODY BLOCK a teammate because someone WON’T STOP STARING or they try their best attempt to take a photo of your team, but they don’t know that we have been doing this for a year, and we can spot that from a mile away.. Or covering up your teammates eyes because she noticed a really attractive man on the street but we signed a contract not to date for a year. What about the feeling you get when you see your world race bff after being apart for a month because you’re no longer on the same team and leadership likes to split you apart.. (KIDDING.. sorta) And the 4 hour coffee date you need to have in order to tell them every detail of what happened that month. All the team troubles, personal troubles, the people you have met, the ministry you have done, what the Lord is teaching you and complain about your living conditions for just a minute.. (or talk about the fact that you had a BED or took warm showers!!!)
Wow.. I could go on. There are literally endless amount of things I am going to miss. But, isn’t it beautiful.. having memories and people and places that mean so much, you’ll never forget it for the rest of your life?
– jordan
