I’ve been dreading writing this blog post for awhile because I’m not quite sure how to form into words my story or how I’m feeling. The same is true if you talk to me in person, I can’t form words or even sentences about this. I’m still in shock this is all happening. Where do I start…
Well, I guess I’ll start at the beginning.
Three years ago in 2015, I attended TeenPact’s National Convention, a week-long Christian, conservative political conference for teenagers. During the week they had several speakers come up and share their story or share a message. There was this one woman in particular who stood out to me that week; her name was Christian Barnes. She shared her story about her faith, how she met her husband, and how she went on the World Race.
That was my first exposure to hearing about the World Race, I remember jotting the name down in my notebook and filing it away in my head. I thought about it throughout the years, but I had to be 18 to apply so I never gave it much thought beyond telling myself “maybe”.
I graduated high school in the year of 2016, and like most high school graduates I got the question, “So, what are your plans now?” At the time I was doing online college, so my answer was to continue online college and get my degree in environmental science, but to be honest college was not something I wanted to continue (at least not at this time in my life). I would much rather be making a difference with my life for God and to be doing something adventurous. That was my prayer for awhile, that I would not have the typical experience in life. That I would not just graduate, go to college, get married and forever be a stay at home mom. Not that I wouldn’t mind that, I just wanted something different.
Fast forward to 2017. The start of the year was rough and it progressively got rockier. It was bad decision by me, after hurt, after rejection, after loneliness.
I was a MESS at the beginning of this year, a big, old, terrible mess.
But by the grace and love of God, I am not who I was at the beginning of this year.
In February, I made the decision to move to Louisiana to join a group I had met the previous year on a missions trip, to be a missionary in New Orleans. After about a month of announcing this, my plans fell through and I was not able to go. I was devastated. I remember crying and yelling at God why wasn’t this His plan? Those of you who know me know I absolutely loved New Orleans and Louisiana and the South as a whole. I loved street ministry and evangelizing to people on Bourbon Street. Hearing that I was not able to go broke my heart and broke my plans. I thought I finally found my purpose. I had put all my trust into this move to get me a new life.
Fast forward a month or two, I got an opportunity to move in with a friend, so naturally, I took it. Up until July, I planned on moving in with my friend, but after circumstances arose and I left to go visit family on *VERY* short notice (I’m talking twenty minutes short notice). I did not end up moving in with my friend. I remember the two weeks I spent in Michigan being very hard and very freeing at the same time. God worked out a lot of stuff in me in those weeks. He showed me that the sound of His grace in this moment was release. I had to be released from my old life to have a better one. I knew that when I went home I would have a completely different life from the one I left. God did something in those two weeks that finally made me content with staying in Massachusetts and content with not having to be in the “in” group.
For the next few months, I became comfortable and very much ok with living in Massachusetts. I got a full-time job on a farm (best. job. ever.), made new friends, and because of God, became so much more joyful. In August I pulled the file in brain out titled “World Race” and examined it. I decided to just look at the routes and see what they were. When I went on the World Race website, I saw that they were going to be announcing World Race Gap Year routes in Septemeber, so I signed up to be notified when they were released.
When the routes were released I decided to just send in an application. After I filled out the application I had to set up a phone interview, so I did. I thought, “why not”, if God says no then I will continue to be a missionary in Massachusetts and to those around me and if He says yes I’ll go.
On October 17, I had a phone interview. After the interview, they said they would call back in three to five days to let me know if I was accepted or not. Now, to restate, I was perfectly ok if the answer was no, but that week I watched my phone like a hawk. I checked it about 100 times every hour just to make sure I didn’t miss the call. My younger brother, Michael, eventually caught on to my craziness and changed his number to “No Caller ID” and called me a few times just to torment me.
Exactly a week later they called me…
I GOT ACCEPTED!!!!!
I was completely in awe and shock that God had said yes to this and that I was accepted. I still am in shock that this is all happening and that I am going to be leaving for nine months to be a missionary. This is way bigger than what I ever thought, but that’s God for ya; He always goes above and beyond.
I asked for New Orleans, Louisiana and God gave me the world.
So where does this leave me now? Well, next September I will be leaving for nine months to go to four different countries; Guatemala, Thailand, Malaysia, and Swaziland. I will be working with local churches and missionaries to meet the needs of each community. I will be traveling with one LARGE backpack and a team of people who have the same calling on their life. I will need to fundraise, as well as work for the money I need to go on this trip. You’ll be hearing more from me on how to help support my race in the very near future!
I encourage those of you reading my blog to subscribe so you can hear more of what God is doing in my life and so you can read about the stories I will have to share while on the race!
God closed a lot of doors this year, but as I look back, I am starting to realize that they were just windows. I kept looking out them and seeing what I wanted and when I tried to crawl through them God shut them. What I didn’t see was the huge door He had behind me. I see now that all I had to do was turn around and listen to Him and the door would open to things much bigger than what I saw out those windows.
My God is so, so good.
