Courage. Courage by definition means “the ability to do something that frightens one.”
When I felt God calling me to do the World Race Gap Year, I said “yes” without any hesitation. It has now been around 2 months since I was accepted and the full magnitude of this whole journey has truly started to sink in. For those who don’t know, I am preparing to leave home for 9 months to live in Guatemala, Thailand, Malaysia, and Swaziland to do mission work and spread the truth about Jesus! Recently, as God has been equipping me for this journey, there has been an abundance of emotions, from joy to heartache, weighing heavy on my heart.
I am constantly overwhelmed by what an amazing opportunity this is, and how blessed I am to have been handpicked by God to do it. I have the chance to live out the gospels and simply show people the love and power of Jesus in the most simple and raw settings. I think about the countries I will be living in, the people I will be loving, and the communities that will soon have a dear piece of my heart. I think about how I truly am putting my whole life into the hands of God. Here on Earth, I will be His hands and feet, and He will direct my every step. The joy and wonder that springs from these thoughts of mine are massive!
Then there are other days when I think about leaving my family for 9 months and all I feel like doing is crying. How will I manage these hard goodbyes? I think about missing my little brother’s freshman year of high school. I think about not being there for senior night and homecoming for some of my closest friends. There are so many milestones I won’t get to experience while I’m gone. I think about the relationships I currently have with people and how they will be affected. What is going to come from all of this? Everything is far out of my comfort zone. All of these things frighten me.
But, I am finding my courage in God. My heart is desperately asking the Lord for bravery while facing this mountain of fear, like David up against Goliath. This season of my life, complete with joy and anxiety, has been challenging me to trust God more and more and wholeheartedly believe in His bigger plan. I know that even though I will miss out on things happening at home, I will be exactly where God wants me to be. His promises will not fail. He knows entirely what needs to happen in order to shape me into the person He has been called to be.
The road may have highs and the road may have lows, but God will never leave my side. He gives me courage.
