Good Morning! Crazy to think that I’ve already been back in Cambodia for over a week! Last Tuesday night my squad and I (well everyone but my co-leader and a racer) arrived in Phnom Penh, after a 30-hour travel day. Amidst the excitement of our big trek across the world, a racer, sweet Kenley threw her passport in her pocket and it fell out on our plane from Atlanta to Chicago, before we connected to Korean Air. In the moment, we all were a little perplexed on what to do… but Jesus took the wheel!! The story makes me laugh now. Everything worked out, and they met up with us on Friday night.
We are living for the next 5 weeks at University of the Nations, in Toch Village, which is in the Kampot Province. We’re about a 40 minute drive to the gulf of Thailand, which feeds into the Indian Ocean. On Saturday, we’re traveling to Rabbit Island, so I’ll get to see that body of water for the first time… pretty neat.
University of the Nations is a ministry that has planted serval churches in villages around the area. Our squad of 14 is living at one of them. Ministry involves different activities such as teaching english, leading worship and intercession, playing soccer with kids, digging up a pond, attending Sunday church, and home visits. If you kept up with my blogs in Africa last summer, you probably can guess that I was pretty stoked to have home visits on the schedule. I love building relationships in the community. I’ve yet to find a form of work, or a person that makes me feel as alive as spreading the love of God to people in their homes.
This time around, my daily tasks look a little different. As a squadleader, my role is to empower our racers to seek growth in their intimacy with Christ, as well as empower them to live out their spiritual giftings. I’ve never been in such constant communication with the Holy Spirit. Truly learning what it means to die to my desires, and let Him lead. Of course, I’ve already failed, but I’m actively working on a quicker repent turnover time. One of my friends sent me a worship song a couple weeks ago, Catch the Wind (Spontaneous), by Bethel Music. A lot of the lyrics are simply speaking life over the listener. I’ve clung onto, “I am steadfast, no compromise.” There’s no choice, but to cling to God, with a steadfast pursuit in this season. Of course this very act is already prompting growth, healing and peace in my own life.
-Free to be.- Yesterday afternoon, while laying in a hammock in our ministry yard, I heard those words clear as day, from the Holy Spirit. I surrendered to the Lord’s will to lead this trip back in early June. But the 6 months after that… were hard. I was challenged with so much doubt. It’s crazy how much louder the world can scream at you, as opposed to the soft quiet voice of God. Comparison. Am I falling behind my friends? How is this going to look on a resume? What are they going to think of me fundraising again? I shouldn’t be having to depend on my parents for somewhere to live, and a car to drive. Every morning I sought the Father to pour truth over my life, but some days I let insecurity or rejection win.
Being back on the mission field… along with a much treasured week at the Adventures in Missions Headquarters.. has shut down all those voices in my head. I couldn’t feel more full and confident that I am exactly where I am meant to be. The simplicity of living in a village, without all the comforts that can be very attractive to numb my pain with, have allowed for the spirit to just wash through my soul. I am so thankful that God fought for me to come here, even when I wanted to turn away.
Thank you for taking the time to hear out my heart in this considerably lengthy blog. I’m so grateful for all of the messages I’ve received, sorry my time to respond takes a little longer than usual out here. Just know that any kind word is well received. May the rest of your week be filled with love, hope and joy.
xo, Hannah
