A BILLION STARVING PEOPLE
We are leaving Myanmar tomorrow. Whenever we leave a country I end up thinking about the impact I made. About how I could have done more; how I should have done more. How I didn’t give enough to the beggars. How I wasn’t intentional enough with the students. How I didn’t share the Gospel when I could have. There is so much need and I wonder where the Lord is in all of this.
From the moment we set foot in Myanmar I encountered its poverty. As we crossed the border with our huge packs on we passed so many beggars. Seeing our huge packs and hands full of belongings they reached out pleading for anything. The children grasped at plastic bags filled with food hoping that it would be released to them. I can only imagine what their lives are like. I have not the slightest idea. I have never known desperation. Filled with sympathy in this moment I gave up half of my pastries and a water bottle. It felt so little though. I could only imagine them all tearing the cinnamon rolls into small pieces to share; if they shared at all; would the first to see it take as much as he could? Do they even have the luxury to think of others?
Living here in Yangon the past month, the largest city in Myanmar with a population of over 5 million, I see a lot of faces. Whenever I leave the house I pass by thousands of people. That old beggar always on the street corner. The men with stained red teeth spitting juice from the betel nut chew (similar to tobacco). The young men laughing as they smoke their cigarettes. The countless people at their stands hoping to make enough to live on. The thousands walking to only God knows where. The drunks and disabled among them. Each living there own story. Each one cared for by the Lord; each one in His plan; each one needing the love of God in their life. Yet so many of these people will never know the Lord.
I find myself crying out to God for them; that somehow somewhere they would have the chance to encounter the Lord. I feel helpless though. What can I do other than pray?
Being on the Race I’ve seen so much need. Beggars. Drunks. Addicts. Broken people trying to find purpose in a life of pain. Recently I found myself contemplating with the Lord:
Lord I know you are just; but how is this just? I know you are provider but why are there so many who go hungry? I know you are comforter yet why are so many in pain and anguish. I know you have a wonderful plan, are sovereign, and love everyone. How is it fair that I should know you and love you and experience your love so deeply when millions have never had the chance. I want people to get a taste of you. I want people to experience you as I have. Father, where are you in this dark world? I know even when I don’t see or feel it you are working. I know you don’t need us but it sure often seems that way when people go hungry and go without hearing your name. It seems like it’s on us, as your followers. There seems to be a heavy burden on us. But I know it shouldn’t be that way. It’s a privilege because you are always working; you don’t need us. But I don’t understand it. It seems so much like you do need us. But I trust you know what you’re doing. I trust you. I lift up all who haven’t heard your name; all the broken and hurting.
NOT THE NORMAL LIFE
The Race is often romanticized. It is expected to be a time of adventure, life changing revelations from the Lord, unimaginable stories from ministry; in short a life-changing and once in a lifetime experience. But being on it for five months now I’ve found myself going through the motions.
Despite all the need I see around me and the genuine desire I have to help them I’m selfish and entitled. I’m unmotivated to actually step out of my comfort zone and do something about it. I’m unmotivated to do more than what’s required of me during ministry. I am excited for four months to pass and finally be heading home.
This is normal life; I’ve grown used to it; I’m growing complacent. I’m just waiting for experiences to come to me. But no more! Jesus has placed me here to share his love. Jesus has me here for a great purpose. Jesus has and is continually changing my life with His abundant grace and love. The reason He’s chosen me and blessed me with so much is to share that with others. He has me here to take the initiative, to live boldly, to take up my cross and lay down my flesh, to step out and have faith!
It’s hard to stop thinking of myself. It’s hard to consider others. If I’m not intentional this life will slip by and I’ll have nothing to show for it; nothing to be proud of when I look back on my earthly life. Every moment is an opportunity to love God and/or to love others. But it’s in my nature to love only myself. But there is nothing to gain from that other than temporary pleasure. There is everything to gain from loving God and others. Lives to be saved and hearts to be healed.
“I find it hard to turn away a billion starving people. But what can one do? I’ve heard you say you can’t save someone’s life. I want to save a life today. I want to get someone close with my Father. Feed them the bread of life today. I want to help them get stronger. Help them last longer. And give them a chance to see Jesus.” – Keith Green, A Billion Starving People
This seems like a heavy burden. This seems to place all the responsibility on us. But God carries it. God does not needs us to do His work but He invites us into it. He gives me the privilege of serving Him. I don’t need to have everything figured out. I just need to act in obedience. Though it seems long this life is short. Every act of sacrificial love will be worth it!
I may never know if the pastries and water I gave to those beggars had lasting impact or if they felt love from it. I may never know if sharing my testimony several times this month will have impacted someone and drawn them closer to you. I may never know if someone I gave a flier to will come to know the Lord because of it. But I do know that if I’m faithful with the opportunities God places in front of me He will be faithful to show up. If I’m faithful to plant the seed He will be faithful to make it grow. Feeding the billion starts with feeding one.
“I don’t want to go through the motions. I don’t want to go one more day without your all consuming passion inside of me. I don’t want to spend my whole life asking, ‘What if I had given everything, instead of going through the motions.’” – Matthew West, The Motions
Heading into another month in Thailand I am determined to live more intentionally. To seek out opportunities to be generous, to love, and to be bold. I’m not going to wait for things to happen. I’m going to make things happen.
