Hello! Last week, I did a series on my Instagram about beauty and how God has grown me in that area. I thought I would share it on the blog for anyone not on Instagram:)
Beauty(1/3)//I have decided that if I am going to have an Instagram, I am going to use to to be honest with my life, and what God is teaching me. The past 3 years have been a journey of finding my beauty. These photos are from junior year. I had acne worse that I liked to admit, and it was painful and left me feeling like makeup never looked good, so why did I even try? Heck I didn’t even feel pretty at my junior prom, after spending hours at the salon getting my hair and makeup done. I knew all the verses- I was fearfully and wonderfully made. I was more precious than rubies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, that’s what God thought about me, but not everybody else. The mom fan club always tells me that I am pretty…but that’s in the mom job description. I simply decided that I was not beautiful. I was confident in certain parts of my life, so I think I allowed that to overshadow my true feelings about my beauty. I would never admit to anyone that I didn’t like what I saw when I looked in the mirror- that would show weakness and insecurity.
Beauty(2/3)//My senior year, a weird thing happened. I even remember telling my YL leader- I thought I was beautiful for the first time. And not in a superficial way, but because I knew where my beauty came from- being created in God’s image. These photos are some of the first ones that I specifically remember looking at and thinking that I looked good in them. Now you are probably wondering how I got to this point…and it wasn’t overnight, and it honestly wasn’t something that I was purposefully working towards. I never sat down and thought “how can I start seeing my beauty.” Sure my acne medicine started working, but I have a strong feeling that wasn’t it. It occurred naturally through my growing relationship with God. My junior and senior year, my faith starting becoming my number one priority. For the first time, I was excited to read my Bible, excited to pray, etc. As my mind became more focused on things above, and less on the things of the world, ironically enough, my confidence in my earthly body transformed in amazing ways. This post is not me proclaiming my beauty. It’s not me looking for attention. It is me PROCLAIMING the renewal of our hearts and mind that the Lord provides. My physical eyes, body, and mirror stayed the same. But God changed my perspective, one that BELIEVED God’s truth not to be just a little verse that he thought about me, but the ultimate belief that I should build my life upon.
Beauty(3/3)//Here we are, on the World Race. I don’t have a single hair appliance or styling product. I wear the same clothes for 4 days straight. I haven’t shaved my legs in 5 months. I went basically 3 months without looking in the mirror. I have gained weight…to the point where the Swazi kids would rub my belly because they thought that I was pregnant ?? But here is the crazy thing. I doesn’t affect the TRUTH that God has placed in my heart, the TRUTH that endures forever. Of course, it is fun when I borrow someone’s straightener and do my makeup once a month, but I don’t rely on that to find my value. The Lord is using this experience to transform and redeem my idea of beauty. In the African bush, Nepali city, and Indian village, I have found the most freedom and Truth about this body that God had planned even before my parents. I think the point of this series of posts is not really about me, or my feelings, it is about the freedom that God provides. His desire is for personal relationship, intimate devotion. Jesus’ death on the cross has already provided freedom for anything you can imagine- your self-image, your crippling anxiety, your growing porn addiction, your drug abuse. No matter what, Jesus is there, calling your name, offering freedom.
