Written October 11
There’s something inside of me that wants to cry out to God.
It’s crying out.
There’s something deep down inside.
It’s been hidden for a while.
Smushed down and suppressed.
I’ve had little tastes of these things.
There’s more than what has been seen at the moment.
There’s so much inside of me that’s just waiting to come out.
Waiting for freedom.
My body hasn’t caught up with my spirit.
I see myself lifting my hands to praise the One worthy of all praise.
But my body hasn’t caught up. My hands don’t go up.
There are prayers inside me. Wanting to be heard.
But my mouth doesn’t open.
I see myself with my hand on someone’s back and saying words that I don’t understand. They’re too deep for me, but the person understands clearly.
But my body doesn’t put my hand on the person’s back. Instead, my hand covers my mouth.
I see a guy walking down the street. His eyes are closed. They look glued together. I see my thumbs move across his eyes and his eyes opening.
But I just see it.
My body doesn’t cooperate.
Where did my boldness go?
Where did my great faith go?
Why doesn’t my body do what I feel inside of me?
What needs to be broken loose?
I walk by a guy.
I smile at him.
I see the demon in his eyes.
He puffed at me like a dragon puffs after he blows fire.
I want to say, “You have no place here!”
But nothing comes out.
I keep walking.
Feeling like I’m going to get attacked from behind.
Jesus
Jesus
Jesus
I’m protected.
I can’t explain.
My body is catching up. My body is catching up. My body is catching up.
God, what part of the body am I?
All I hear is fingernail. (Yeah… It doesn’t make sense to me either)
Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come. Jeremiah 33:3
