“As Jesus went with him he was surrounded by the crowds. A woman in the crowd had suffered for twelve years with constant bleeding, and she could find no cure. Coming up behind Jesus, she touched the fringe of his robe. Immediately, the bleeding stopped. ‘Who touched me? Jesus asked. Everyone denied it, and Peter said ‘Master the whole crowd is pressing up against you. But Jesus said, ‘Someone deliberately touched me for I felt healing power go out from me.’ When the woman realized she could not stay hidden, she began to tremble and fell to her knees in front of him. The whole crowd heard her explain why she had touched him and that she had been immediately healed. ‘Daughter’ he said to her, ‘your faith has made you well. Go in peace.’” (Luke 8:42-48)
“If a woman has a flow of blood for many days that is unrelated to her menstrual period, or if the blood continues beyond the normal period, she is ceremonially unclean. As during her menstrual period, the woman will be unclean as long as the discharge continues. Any bed she lies on and any object she sits on during that time will be unclean, as during her normal menstrual period. If any of you touch these things you will be ceremonially unclean. You must wash your clothes and bathe yourself and you will remain unclean until evening. When the woman’s bleeding stops, she must count off seven days. Then she will be ceremonially clean.” (Lev 15:25-28)
After reading that passage in Leviticus, I saw the story of the sick woman in Luke through new eyes. The woman from Luke had been bleeding for twelve years, which meant she had been a sort of outcast from society for twelve years. According to the law of Moses, if anyone touched her they would be unclean for the rest of the day. Anything she touched would have to have been washed. So not only is it incredible that Jesus felt her touch his robe in a crowd of jostling people, but the woman would have had to have a lot of nerve to shove through the crowd, touching countless people when she wasn’t supposed to touch anyone. Everyone she touched would have been unknowingly ceremonially unclean. She had a lot of faith that just touching Jesus’s robe would make her well, but she wanted to slip away quietly, unnoticed. Her plans were ruined when Jesus took notice and called for her to identify herself. Having to tell the whole crowd of people why she touched Jesus’s robe was probably humiliating, to say the least. But by coming forward, she was also able to tell the crowd of something wonderful, and receive blessing from Jesus, the object of the crowd’s attention. By humbling herself and speaking despite the embarrassment, she brought glory to God and she was blessed.
God showed me this perspective at Debrief, and it has a theme for me in ministry. I struggle constantly to talk because my Spanish is very bad, but I know it’s better to push through my embarrassment and try, than to remain silent. Despite my embarrassment God has brought so much blessing through this, and I have gotten to know the women from Nicaragua a little bit better.
Furthermore, my team and I lead a lot of the activities and small devotionals before lunch, both of which can be intimidating at times. The other day, my teammate came to me before ministry stressing because we hadn’t planned a devotional for that day. We brainstormed ideas for what we could talk about, and what would be meaningful to the women. I brought up the story of the sick woman in Luke. I hadn’t planned out my thoughts on the story but as I told my teammate about it I felt like I should do a devotional on it.
When the time came, I had second thoughts. I went back to my teammate panicking a little. How was I supposed to have our ministry host translate if I hadn’t planned out what I was going to say. I would lose my train of thought. My teammate reminded me that God would provide, so I went to give the devotion. Our host read the story in Luke and I talked about it briefly. My thoughts were jumbled and it was messy, but I got my point across. My point was the theme that God highlighted to me, to stand up despite embarrassment, for His glory. Even in giving that devotion I stood up despite my intimidation, and God used that in a really cool way.
After lunch, our ministry host told me that one of the ladies had come up to her after I lead the devotional. She told my ministry host that she had been wanting to recommit her life to Christ, but that she was too embarrassed. After hearing about the woman in the bible, she said she said she wanted to recommit her life to Christ. Yay! Praise God!
It is powerful to do the very things that embarrass us, and there is so much freedom in doing those things. In ministry, here in Costa Rica, I have learned to lay down my pride and love wholeheartedly. When I’m not worried about self image, I am free to love without boundaries. I get to serve these women and in the process I am learning so much from them. With embarrassment out of the way, I get to glorify God all the more. Afterall, it’s in the uncomfortable that the Holy Spirit comforts. In embracing the uncomfortable I get to come along side of and be a part of what God is already doing in these women’s lives. It’s incredible what God does when I don’t live just for myself.
