I promise this wasn’t clickbait. I’ll explain the title soon!
One of my favorite things in this world is being surrounded by a community of believers because it gives me a glimpse of the Kingdom. That was one of my favorite things about working at WinShape camp a couple summers back, one of the things that made my time at Anderson University so good, and it’s already one of the sweetest gifts about having a World Race squad. But with that sweet gift, the enemy likes to be really rude and thrive on my tendency to compare.
There are amazing people on my squad, y’all. There are capable and passionate nurses, loving teachers, talented photographers, rad surfers and dolphin trainers, fitness inspirations, fearless adventurers, the friendliest meme-sharers and The Office lovers, gentle fighters for social justice, brilliant creatives, and wise and dedicated Jesus lovers. I have had the privilege of getting to know these people since being accepted to the World Race last September, and they already mean so much to me. Like seriously, I love them all so much I could weep! Love love love them. But to be honest with you guys, there were times when these people terrified me.
There have been days since the very beginning of this process in January of 2017 when I’ve asked the Lord and friends who have walked alongside me in this journey what on earth I have to offer to my squad, my team, and the people we’re going to encounter on the Race. I have felt so inadequate, comparing my faith, my interaction with the Holy Spirit, my testimony, my maturity, my fundraising, my ability, my appearance, my compassion, and my wisdom to these people. Every time new groups of people would get added to World Race Route 2, I would avoid social media for a while because I was sent into a panicky spiral of comparing myself to everything I could find about them. I would tearfully go to Jesus and ask Him why He called me to this when I was so easily overwhelmed by the people I would be doing life and ministry with for a year. Instead of celebrating their gifts, I envied them and fell further and further into feeling like I was not worthy of going on this trip with them.
Um, can we just talk about how that’s a bunch of garbage for a second? The enemy is such a punk and I am so constantly reminded of that in my human tendency to compare myself to others. For me, with comparison comes resentment, which does not at all promote unity, joy, and community (which are precious things Jesus desires for us – John 17:20-23). Over the past months, the Lord has been showing me so much about valuing others and enjoying their gifts, and realizing that their beauty and their relationships with Him should edify me, not discourage and overwhelm me. We have been given unique gifts, talents, and personalities that glorify Jesus and add to the Body of Christ, and that is cause for celebration! So with that, I just want to let you all know that I love my squad and definitely do not avoid them on social media (even with our surprisingly active 46-people group chat), and to remind you that comparison that tears down is not from the Lord. It’s a weight that clings to us and hinders us from running toward Jesus and His Kingdom (Hebrews 12). Please don’t let comparison steal your joy and contentment or hinder your ability to love and appreciate others.
I LOVE YOU GUYS. Thanks for reading this and keeping up with me!
