Now I can see that Your love is better
Than all the others that I seek
I’m breathing deep all of Your goodness
And loving kindness to me
In this season of transition, I’ve been repeatedly hearing God tell me to chill out, to lean back — look up — and relax into this trust and intimacy that we’ve created with each other. The time it’s taken to develop this trust in Him and intimacy with Him was more because of me. I don’t trust easily. I don’t want to get so vulnerable that there are no walls because it feels unsafe. But slowly and surely, God has been slow dancing me into realization. Waltzing me into the dawn of understanding. He is safe. In every situation, every possibility, every outcome, He is safe for me to lean into.
I was nervous to create a blog talking about why I pushed back my launch date for the World Race: nervous that I would look like a failure for not raising enough money, nervous that it would seem like I was flaking out and quitting, nervous that I wouldn’t look ready to go. Friends, that is the beauty of pushing back my launch date. I’m not a failure – I’m not flaking out – I’ll never be 110% ready and prepared to handle the Race perfectly. I get to shake off those chains of insecurity that pride brought out in me once again, and I get to stare into the eyes of the enemy, refusing to believe those lies because I have the power of Christ living in me, enabling me to trust and believe what is T R U E
So you’re probably wondering now – what IS true about why I switched my launch date to January?
There are multiple reasons why I’ve pushed my date back. The first is that I’m finishing my internship with School of Ministry Charlotte. It’s my third year here, and I graduate in July (yay!), and in order to transition to my next season in a healthy way, I need to be able to process and breathe a bit after I graduate. If I left in August, I would have had 2 weeks to move my entire life back up to Michigan, see my family, and get down to launch. I have a lot to process and readjust to, and I’ve seen my family for limited amounts of time this last three years. I believe it’s healthy for me to forego leaving 2 weeks after my graduation, and give myself a few months to adjust and breathe, and love on the people in my life that I haven’t gotten to see much!
The second reason is my financial deadlines. I didn’t hit my first deadline, and the main reason for that is simply that I was too busy. I put too many things on my plate and had very little focus to devote to fundraising. My focus was too divided, and for this Race to work? I need my focus and my preparation to be intentional and solely on this next step God is calling me to, which is the Race.
I’ve found that I can’t transition into my next season well when I’m still trying to tie up the ends of the season I’m in now. It’s possible, but then the beginning of my next season and the end of my current one miss out on my focus, intentionality and excellence. It’s time for me to slow myself down and enjoy what God placed me in, and appreciate where it’s brought me – and then dive into and live joyfully in the preparation I need for my next season.
And I will lean back in the loving arms of a beautiful Father
Breathe deep and know that He is good
He’s a love like no other
Thank you guys for supporting me in every way, through prayers, donations, sharing my information, sending thoughts and encouragement, and just being here for this journey. I appreciate each of you – I am sooo blessed by having the people behind me that I have. You’re amazing.
Joyfully pursuing my purpose is easy when I’ve got such a faithful God and supportive home team.
/// Until next time ///