Chile down, Argentina is finished, now we start the 3rd month of this world race. The first two months have been warm, and filled with so much Spanglish. Although our Spanglish is getting much better, we do find ourselves in Bolivia, which as you probably guessed is a Spanish speaking country. Its mostly native people here, the military seems to have a large presence, and the weather is rather brisk. What do you expect at 13,000 ft. The mountains surely are beautiful though.
It’s been tough to find words the last month since it was all squad month, there was no WiFi, and our ministry was kind of sporadic. Don’t get me wrong it was a good month, and it was great to connect with the staff at YWAM Mendoza, and I was able to step out of my comfort zone even more. I was asked to speak in front of the squad (which I have never wrote something and shared it on stage) and I did it. I wrote my own little sermon and it seemed to go well. Being able to share what was on my heart was good. Kind of like these blogs. I am able to share with the world what is going on weekly or so. The problem I’m having now is a lot of the posts I see or read about is all the good things, the way God is doing wonders in peoples lives, the profound beautifully written captions on Instagram about a photo that was probably staged. The ridiculous amount of photos being shared to show how wonderful life as a world racer is. My problem is apparently I didn’t get the memo.
In absolutely no way am I saying God isn’t up to miracles or doing wonderful works in peoples lives, because HE is, I however just don’t understand how, what I see is so much different from these posts. Half the time I read a caption and wonder “What in the WORLD was I doing when this happened,” because what I remember when the picture was taken was certainly not what the caption reads. Its elaborated beyond what really happened; and no they are not all this way.
It’s like I’m missing out, like I’m not apart of what is happening. I haven’t been able to have a profound moment of hearing Gods voice so clear it is blatantly obvious. Is it because I don’t conform, is my heart still not in the right place, am I not reading the right parts of the Bible? Is it because I Still don’t belong, even though I’m surrounded with a great Godly community. People still question what I do now because of my past. How is it that God can forget my past, doesn’t remind me of it and who I was, but all these profound, righteous, Holy Christians of the world, keep bringing it up. They still see me for what they hear from my past and not what they see in the present. As far as I am concerned I am not going to conform to their ways, I am going to continue to live the way God asks of me, and grow in relationship with him. I won’t conform to the ways of the world. I understand all those Holy Christians are only human, but the point of the post is IM frustrated with the masks, the over elaborated stories, the moments of LOOK AT ME, LOOK WHAT HAPPENED BECAUSE OF ME. NO……just stop! Do what the Lord asks and do it for his glory. IF someone happens to see it, then great, but don’t put yourself on a pedestal because God used you for something. Do it with humility, do it without bragging, and don’t do it to look good for humans. Do for Gods glory and nothing else. Life as a world racer is tough mentally, emotionally, and physically. This is just a time of transparencey, God is doing good, but without the tough times; how can we possibly have the beautiful moments without the masks.
Until Next time>>>>>>>>>
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Romans 12:2
