“Home”
In exactly five days, I will be home. Woah…
If I am being honest with you, that is a bit overwhelming. I’m not going to try to sum up these last nine months into a couple of paragraphs, because well, that would be impossible. But here is what I will say.
It’s simple; God’s love.
In His kindness, He called me here for this season.
A season of challenge. Growth. Overflow. FREEDOM. Newness. Heartbreak. Passion. Community.
He has changed me; aligned my heart with His.
And now, He is calling me home.
I’m learning how to thrive in the awkward, unpaved transitions in life. It’s easy to thrive in the BIG, beautiful, over-the-top moments in life. But God doesn’t want us only when we are put together and everything seems exciting. He wants us in the small moments, especially in the unknown, because that is where He sees our faithfulness to Him. I am going home in five days and I don’t know what is next. So here is the truth. I don’t have everything all figured out. And thank God He doesn’t expect that of me. What I do know is that He DOES have everything figured out, so that I don’t have to. He does have a plan for my life and that doesn’t begin when I get home or when I figure out what’s next. I am living out His plan for my life right now and I will be living out His plan as I transition home. I trust Him and I trust His timing and handy-work. Here are some verses that I have clung onto recently:
“God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises are true” -Psalm 18:30
“The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives” -Pslam 37:23
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take” -proverbs 3:5-6
“The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?” -proverbs 20:24
Right now, I’m sitting in our hostel at final debrief reflecting on the last nine months of my life. All I can think about is something that my squad mentor, Kate, told me at the beginning of the race when I was overwhelmed with life and the transition into new, uncomfortable things. All she told me is “You may not feel like it right now, but you’re in a really sweet season”. I remember being so mad when she told me this, because things just seemed messy and not at all sweet. I look back on that time in my life and now I get it. It WAS challenging and messy and uncomfortable, but it caused me to draw closer to God and it was so necessary to get to where I am at now. I’m entering a new season that is challenging and uncomfortable in different ways. And all I can tell myself is the very same thing that Kate told me nine months ago…You’re in a really sweet season.
