Let me tell you about this thing called FEEDBACK.
Feedback is something that World Race encourages us to do every day with our teams. Something that helps build a safe community.
Meriam-Webster describes feed back as information about reactions to a product, a person’s performance of a task, etc. which is used as a basis for improvement.
In my words?…Words that someone who you are in relationship with (friend, family, co-worker etc) shares with you about something you did or are doing. These words are meant to empower and build up one another. They are shared in love. They are not shared to attack someone or their flaws. Feedback is holding up a mirror to a friend saying “this is what I see in you.” Feedback is healthy communication in order to create a healthy environment.
Before I continue on a description or how to feedback has impacted my life I want to share with you some feedback that I have received from my wonderful team and community the first few months of my race.
Some positive feedback I have received:
- Month 2—I love hearing your bible knowledge and how you are sharing it. You are very humble and don’t boast on what you know. God is going to bless you with more because of the way you are handling it now.
- Month 2—Really liked watching you become more bold in ministry this month. You took the lead and jumped in. Bold in your knowledge and what you bring to the table.
- Month 3—Loved watching you step our in leadership this month. Taking initiative and going out of your wat to serve others.
- Month 4—Being comfortable to be called Cocoa shows how confident you are in stepping out of your box.
Some constructive feedback I have received:
- Month 1—I encourage you to have a cup half full mentality. Sometimes you are quick to jump to the negative thoughts of a situation. Ministry will get tough so I encourage you to stay positive.
- Month 1 & 2 & 3…–Encourage you to step more into vulnerability. Share your thoughts, emotions, feelings, struggles, etc.
- Month 2—Encourage you to enter all situations with an open mind and press into joy no matter what.
- Month 3—I challenge you to recognize and accept that you have other gifts other than knowledge and what you know you have.
I could go on and on with the feedback that I have received this year so far. And I have loved receiving all of it because I know it was given in love, and my teammates want to encourage me in my strengths and challenge me to grow.
Positive feedback is easy. It is easy to praise someone for the things that they are doing well. Positive feedback is important because it builds others up and encourages them to continue what they are doing well.
Constructive feedback also builds people up. I have learned on the race, that there are flaws in my life that I may not recognize. For example I had no idea that my sarcasm could sometimes created a negative environment within my team. I wouldn’t have known this until someone who cares for me shared it with me.
How to give feedback:
Giving constructive feedback to someone is sometimes difficult. I still struggle at sharing it. It puts your in a vulnerable place. It’s hard to express emotions and feelings, or you are afraid to hurt someone’s feelings. But God helps you through it. God gives you the words to say and how to share it. Before giving feedback, I strongly encourage myself and everyone to take it to God and pray. Ask Him and yourself, is this something that needs to brought up? Is it just a personal preference or problem? What words does God want you to share? Pray pray and pray. When giving feedback be free to say what you feel God telling you to say. Keep an open mind in giving it, because the other person could receive it different then you perceive.
When is the best time to give feedback?
Any time. But make sure you are ready to give it. Don’t do it out of anger or negative emotions. In the moment feedback is awesome. More real, authentic. Example: if you witness someone opening a door for someone, be sure to express that you’ve witnessed it. Say something like “I really love that you go out of your way to serve other people.”
The best place to give feedback is in a one-on-one setting. Sometimes when feedback is given in front of a group of people they may feel attacked, even when that is not your intentions.
How to receive feedback well:
When someone gives you feedback, your response should be “thank you” and only that. Do not try to defend yourself. Do not respond with a quick response. That person, who cares for you, took time to pray about it and stepped out into vulnerability to share it with you. Your next step after saying thank you is to take it to God. Thank God for the feedback and ask him how He wants you to grow from it. Take time to process.
After talking your feedback to God and the feedback doesn’t sit well with you still, bring it up with the person who gave it to you, but be careful with this. Bringing it up again could create conflict. Create a safe space and talk. Ask them to clarify, ask them to pray with you about the feedback. Explain to them your misunderstanding and how it doesn’t sit well. Sometimes (rarely) the feedback given might not have been from God and that is fine. Remember people are people and we make mistakes.
So yeah, that is feedback. I hope it makes sense. I hope you can learn from it. Feedback is a code word for healthy communication. When there is healthy communication there is a healthy community.
Please reach out to me if you want to know more about feedback. It has greatly impacted me on my race. I would love to share with you more on how it has helped me grow as a person.
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