The last 4 days have been spent with atleast 100-something world racers all in different “walks” of the race, at an Adventures in Missions conference called “The Awakening”.
We had two squads heading into month 4 ( E & F), one squad on month 7 (B), and one squad on month 9 (V).
We got to come together and just give eachother little nuggets the Lord has revealed to us on our journeys and just make new friends (my literal fav).
As I’m laying in bed processing the last few days I can’t help but think on the feedback my team mate just gave to me only a few hours ago.
“Marge, I genuinely see you being awakened in your giftings”
What. Validation. Wow.
This week I genuinely believe I walked in freedom. Freedom out of fear and into bravery, courage, and confidence. Those are things that I’ve been praying for myself in certain areas for quite sometime and I actually got to see the buds of fruit from it.
I stepped up to the plate and led worship. Not only stand up (actually sit down cuz ya girl is on crutches) infront of everyone and sing, but stop what I thought worship needed to look like and let the Holy Spirit take the lead in that. Talk about freeing. And extremely terrifying.
I started speaking more in boldness with my spiritual gifts and being confident enough to start teaching others about it as well and praying openly when the Lord prompts me to do so. I’ve had more courage to say the things the Lord asks me to and see how that is blessed not just for me but for the other person as well.
I’m learning that my giftings can either intimidate me, which empowers the enemy, or my giftings can intimidate the world and empower the Kingdom. If I’m being real, I’d rather have a #sorrynotsorry attitude if it means I’m bringing glory to the Lord. My job as a Daughter of the Most High King is to bring heaven down to earth and if that means that I have to fight through panic attacks every single time before I pick up a mic and sing, or have to sound like a crazy person for a bit so the Lord can say what He needs to through me… then that’s fine by me.
I want to be dangerous. I want to be intimidating. I will be a force to be reckoned with for the sake of the cross.
I genuinely have just wanted to do the “Christian coast” for as long as I have been a true Christian. This experience with the race just makes me realize that we don’t need anymore coasters, we need bulldozers. We need people ready to tear down the stigma that’s been placed on Christ-followers. We need a generation ready to knock down the walls of their own comfort zone for the sake of others to be loved fully. We need men and women ready to do the most for the people who hate them and mock them. We need TRUE disciples.
I’ve been playing games this whole time. I’ve been okay with the bare minimum because honestly anything but that is terrifying. I’m not doing anybody any favors by sitting back and being silent and complacent. I’m helping no cause by being ashamed of my gifts that have been graciously given to me. None of us are.
I’m being woken up to the fullness of a genuine relationship with Christ that goes against the status quo. It’s something that I’m aware of and growing in, but I’m so excited to see how this enlightenment fuels the rest of my Race and the rest of my life.
Thank you Jesus for this life, it’s a priceless privilege.
Xx Marge
