As Christians we are called to daily ‘Die to Self.’ So what does that look like? What does dying to self even mean?
In the Word, Jesus said…
Luke 9:23-24
Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it.”
And Paul wrote…
Ephesians 4:22-24
That you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that you put on a new man which was created according to God, in truth righteousness and holiness.
In following Jesus that looks like letting flesh (ourselves), old selves, the enemy, the world fall off of us. Lies, sins and everything that separates us from the Lord.
Continually giving ALL of ourselves to the Lord.
What we don’t always take into account is how that can be easier said than done. When you die to yourself (flesh) it is painful.
In my life, I have let the enemy cling onto me as much as I have allowed him too over and over again. Whether that had been from accepting lies about myself, sins, etc.
Having Jesus I am set free from those bonds.
BUT, just as I have let the enemy into my life, I also have to let the Lord into my life. I have to allow the Lord to change me. To make me new.
The closer I have come to the Lord the more I have felt and seen the spiritual battle waging war within me. Interesting how the enemy doesn’t like that…
So I’m going to be honest, going through these times of feeling broken, weak and daily dying to self. It sucks. It sucks so much for the flesh, BUT it is glorious for the soul, body, spirit.
Below I wanted to share one of my journal entries during our Squad Debrief at the beginning of Taiwan. I want to invite you all, in vulnerability, to see more aspects of this Race and how the Lord is using this journey in my life. So much GROWth.
Little background, Debriefs are planned every couple of months for teaching, reflection, refining and refocusing. A place for us to come together as a whole and let the Lord do some more work in us. And wow did He have something in store for me. Walking through this shedding, more like ripping of self hurt. It was painful, uncomfortable, hard, annoying and unbearable at times.
BUT Jesus. Hope, freedom and wholeness awaits as I (we) let go of more of myself (ourselves), the world and the enemy’s hold on me (us).
._______________________________.
I want to run
I want to cry
I want to quit, leave
My mind active. Negative thoughts swirling around in my head.
Over and over.
I can’t share
Need to speak the truth, to speak life
How do I share the battle raging inside?
One moment fine, the next unsure
A mess
Tired. Exhausted
I want to run
Leave, get away
They won’t notice. They won’t care.
Remember what it’s like to be on your own
But are you really?
Not wanting to take in truth
Wanting to leave, be stubborn. Sit
So much easier to do what I’ve done before
Pity party
Self dissing, being tough on myself
Easy to blame
Need to fix
Come on Leah, get it together
Why do you have to get to this point over and over again!
Why do you keep going in circles
Same old same old
You haven’t changed
Run away, no one cares
Environments, people, relationships they all change
Your stubborn
Your weak
Your quiet
Everyone else is in a better place
Better place with the Lord
More knowledgeable
They make a difference. They have wisdom.
You don’t
STOP THIS!!
Satan, you have no right to speak such lies in her life
Leah, you are mine
I see you, I hear you
My heart breaks for you
I give life, love, hope, purpose
I am for you
I am here
You have so much to give
You are enough
You are worthy
You are loved
You are wise
You are gifted
Come to me
Run to me
I’ll make sense of the storm
Peace to the battle
._______________________________.
I AM
Strong. Bold. Patient. Loving. Free. Embraced. Capable. Deep. Spirit Led. Forgiven. Faithful. Wise. Gentle. Made New. Content. Filled. Peaceful. Deeply Loved.
A DAUGHTER OF THE MOST HIGH KING
What Truth is Jesus speaking over you today?
Sit with Him and ask Him, I know He’d LOVE to share??
ALSO I AM STILL FUNDRASING!!
I am in need of about $3,000 more towards my goal. Please consider coming alongside me and what the Lord is doing with this Squad. It has been such an amazing World Race round 2 for me! If you are able to give any amount, that is appreciated. Every bit helps??
THANK YOU for your financial support and prayers!
