Training Camp:
If asking for a friend, I’d 10/10 recommend (HA).
Explaining training camp, it seems so easy to talk about the HARD THINGS I DID. For instance the time I took a BUCKET shower in 45-degree weather because I hadn’t showered in 4 days. Or when it was day 2, my tent was taken, and I was Bear Grylls female edition, eno-ing in the cold with a tarp wrapped around me. Or the time it stormed and the great flood of E squads’ campsite commenced. OH yea and the night we slept in an “airport” with lights on with the constant WOOSHING sound of a plane taking off and a slight beeping that will never leave your head. Using porta-potties, eating with your hands and only wearing two different outfits for 10 days can’t be that bad… RIGHT??
BUT these 10 days weren’t about the hard things I think I accomplished. It was about me accepting the hard things I needed to hear from my loving God.
I got wrecked.
The lyrics “From the head to the heart, you take me on a journey. Of letting go and getting lost in you. Cause there’s no shame in looking like a fool, when I give you what I can’t keep, to take a hold of you.” say it all, and this is how.
Going into training camp I had this expectation that God was going to do something big and like always, he exceeded those expectations.
These past couple months have been hard to connect with God. Of course I’ve had good days and He’s given me revelations but it hasn’t been the season of walking in His fullness that my heart has longed for. Because I am human, I have caught myself in my HEAD asking Him to speak, flat out begging God to fall afresh on me, or meet me where I am or just to SHOW UP.
Day 4 (or 5 who knows…) but I’m doing it again. I’m begging God to show up and HE DOES… except with a crisp whisper into my HEART and soul that was slightly hard to hear. But He doesn’t care because I needed to hear it.
I heard Him say, “Katie read Isaiah 43 again.” Isaiah 43 “When you pass through waters, I will be with you… fear not for I am with you.” He continued to say “I am always here. YOU need to show up. The more you beg me to show up, the more you assume I’m not always right beside you.”
It was in that moment that I let go of my pride, stepped into that space and got lost in God the Fathers’ love for me. I was weeping but smiling. I knew that my Father in heaven was holding me and weeping with me. It was beautiful.
I share this because I love God with my whole heart. I want to live my life chasing after Him. But I have to SHOW UP in obedience every day in order to receive his fullness. I have to SHOW UP in my quiet times even if He feels distant because I KNOW He is beside me. I have to SHOW UP in faith, knowing His power when praying for people. I have to SHOW UP in trust when I ask Him things and He answers in ways I don’t understand and will never understand. I have to SHOW UP in love even when it’s hard. I have to SHOW UP in hope because my God is a good God.
*If you’re reading PLEASE don’t twist this. I know He loves us very much!! Even if we don’t show up daily, (which has happened and I’ve only been home 4 days.) I know He still blesses us. He still showers us with His grace and mercy. Thanks to what Jesus did on that cross.*
John 1:16 “For from His fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.”
BUT His fullness for our lives is what we have to choose daily and SHOW UP FOR. He’s just waiting for our Yes.
On the race I have to SHOW UP. I have to choose God every second. I’ve learned that in this choice, I am choosing to love my team, my squad and the people of the nations. I have to be present or I won’t experience what God has been preparing for me. I have to SHOW UP so God can USE me to reach his lost children, heal the sick, love the orphans, extend His grace to the widows, prostitutes, hurting and homeless.
God, I don’t want to keep the comfort of this world. I want to take hold of the comfort only you offer in this time of uncertainty.
If we don’t show up for what God has in our lives, we’ll miss out. I don’t know about you, but I’m not trying to miss out on this adventure with Him.
Thank you God for always showing up, I love you too!
– Katie B
also my squad is the beez neez!!!
