This past month in Thailand was a new season for my team and I so in order to set the tone for the rest of our season, we collectively agreed to practice spiritual and physical discipline together.
For me, God laid on my heart to do my every day morning alone time with Him and also fasting from dinner the whole month.
I was so excited to get new revelations and breakthroughs from this discipline because I’ve done this practice before and I saw so much fruit in it.
As the days and weeks went by, these were the questions and struggles that were going through my mind:
1. Why am I not hearing your voice as much as I usually do Lord?
2. How come I feel like I’m not growing in any area this month?
3. How come I’m not experiencing any breakthroughs or growth?
4. Am i even doing this fast correctly?
5. Is my heart even in the right place God?
I was confused why God wasn’t speaking to me. I was wondering why I wasn’t getting any wisdom or new revelations when I prayed or read the bible. I was feeling discouraged.
I wanted to practice this discipline because I wanted to grow my intimacy with Him and I wanted to hear more from Him. I wanted to show and express to Him that I’m serious about Him and I wanted to be intentional. I wanted more, but I just couldn’t see or experience any victory.
It wasn’t until a few days before we left Thailand that He revealed what He was trying to teach me this month.
He gave me two words: TRUST and REST.
He wanted me to learn how to trust and rest in Him during silent seasons. During the times where I can’t hear His voice, He wants me to trust in Him that He knows what He’s doing. During the times where I can’t feel His presence, He wants me to rest in Him that He is still right beside me.
God wanted to teach me that sometimes we will go through life where He may seem like He’s not there with you no matter how hard you pray. However, it doesn’t mean that He’s not present. It doesn’t mean He’s not hearing your prayers and it doesn’t mean that He’s withholding from you.
It simply means that He wants you to trust and rest in Him through the bad and good, through the highs and lows, through all seasons of life.
