Just a few days prior to leaving for our first month in Guatemala I was praying and asked God to show me why he wanted to me to go on the race. I knew that I wanted to do missions as a full time job, I knew I wanted to experience as many different cultures and types of ministries as possible to see if God had any of these for me long term, but I felt that their was an even more specific reason that I was missing.
During one of my times with the Lord I was listening to a song called “Reckless Love” by Steffany Gretzinger and it HIT ME.
Her song talks about how reckless God’s love is for us. How before we spoke a word God was singing over us, how he chose to breathe life into us. How his pursuit of us doesn’t stop there. How his love is reckless AND wild. His love chases us down and leaves to 99 to find us, to have US. How there is no shadow he won’t light up, mountain he won’t climb up coming after us. No wall he won’t kick down, lie he won’t tear down coming after us.
When thinking about how reckless God’s love is for us, 1st I get so fired up that I follow a God who leaves the 99 to chase after ME, to pursue ME. 2nd I can’t help but respond to that kind of love. I can’t help but want others to feel that same pursuit, that same reckless love. I can’t help but want to chase after the one in my life, the one I see in each situation I am placed in.
Right then I knew why I was supposed to go on the race: to recklessly chase after the one.
I thought about this a lot for the next few days and then it quickly slipped out of my mind and I lost focus.
We flew to Guatemala and entered into our first month of ministry at an orphanage/school for individuals with disabilities. We were quickly ushered into a new culture, with a different dominant language and a place that we had never been before. It was easy to get overwhelmed or even distracted by everything going on and soon I couldn’t remember why I was here.
It wasn’t until that weekend when I was walking down a small dirt road on the way back from a picnic while guiding a girl named Rosie from the orphanage that it clicked. I was walking with the one. I was sleeping next to the one. I was eating meals next to the one. I was living with the one.
Each child here was the “one” in their society at one point: the cast out, the left behind, the forgotten, the uncared for. Each of these children has a different story of how they ended up in this orphanage. Some were left alone for days without food and water, some were cast out into a sty to live with the pigs (literally), some were hurt physically and emotionally and some were just left behind because their parents did not know how to handle or care for a child with a disability. It breaks my heart to think about the things these kids have lived through in their lives. But, I am so glad that God saw them and brought them here to Los Gozosos and I am glad that I get to spend time with them now.
I am glad that God has given me the chance to seek out the one even if I am imperfect at it. And I am glad that he left the 99 to seek out me.
