Have you ever heard God’s voice?
Growing up, Dad always told me that as long as I follow the Lord with all my heart, the desires of my heart would be God’s will.
At Training Camp they told us that in case of death in the family you were allowed to leave between 1-3 weeks for the funeral. As soon as I heard that, I also heard God’s voice saying: “family member is going to dye”. I didn’t want to heard that and started to cry. What do you do at a moment like that? You tell others and sound like a crazy person, or simply accept is as God’s way of giving you advance comfort? Well I told myself to stop being silly and enjoy the rest of training camp.
On my flight back from training camp, I started thinking about what to do.
Not knowing what to think of the words I heard, I decided to go say goodbye to my family, or at least to as many as I could.
And today as I stay home from ministry,
the thing that comes to mind is
THANK YOU GOD
Thank you for caring,
Thank you for giving the push I needed to go see everyone before I left,
Thank you for always being by my side,
Thank you for the amazing group of people that are always making me feel loved,
Thank you for being SO AMAZING!!!
Well I guess I didn’t actually update you all did I?
Yesterday my Squad Leader pulled me aside and told me he had bad news. Turns out that Tuesday night around 1am Uncle Doug suffered a heart attach and passed away.
He asked me if I wanted to stay home, since I choose not to go to the US, but all I wanted was to stay as busy as I could. I didn’t want to think about anything, so that’s just what I did.
I worked so much that today as I woke up I was simply burned out, like I had zero energy emotionally or physically, as I talked to my other squad leader, we decided (she told me that even if I didn’t want to stay home she would make me) it would be best for me to stay home, spend time journaling, talking to the Lord and doing whatever it is I feel would help.
Been home for 2 hours and I’m already bored, but I think I like this boredom. There’s so much quiet it’s a little intimidating, but in the quiet comes memories of funny moments. Of the days I’ve spent with uncle Doug. When I think of him I think of baking goods and eating junk, so I think that’s probably what I’ll do for lunch.
Nothing better to remember someone than doing what you remember them by.
I ask that you pray for my family, and those traveling to the funeral this coming Tuesday.
And pray that I can use this day wisely, that I can have fun and enjoy the good memories.
