“God never gives you more than you can handle.” I would love to know who originally said that, because they are wrong. I can describe and lable God in so many ways that are all true. I have heard over and over that He is good, great, holy, wonderful, gracious, sovreign, loving, powerful, steadfast, eternal, fill-in-the-blank. Each of those adjectives are accurate however, there is a word that I have used very often to describe God while on this trip: Challenging. God is very challenging every day.
Here is the truth, God stresses us. He does it on purpose, if He didn’t we would all be weak, pathetic, and not able to truly serve in the way that this world needs. Now God doesn’t NEED us to bring His glory and light into this world, but He wants it, which is why He stresses us to stregnthen us. Ask anyone that knows about lifting weights or excersising, the ONLY way for a body to get stronger is to stress it. That sore feeling the day after a rigorous work out is because of your body repairing itself from the stress you put on it, but it repairs it stronger than before.
God is stressing me out. Not because I am not getting my way or because He is being mean to me, but because He is challenging me to make me stronger. He is doing this because I have replied to His invitation to bring His glory to the world and He needs me to be stronger than I was yesterday.
So how exactly is God stressing me out today? By challenging me on two huge ideas: home and family.
How often did I sit and reflect on these two words and what they mean to me two months ago? How often did I seek God and His thoughts on these two ideas? I didn’t, at all, never. So now I am thousands of miles from where I grew up, the house I lived in and the family I lived with. Away from it all, just as God wanted.
For the past month my squad and I lived in the Dominican Republic in a mountain property that was owned by our ministry hosts. Right around week 3 something interesting happened, everyone started referring to the place simply as “home.” It was no longer, “I’m heading back to the dorm.” It was “I’m going home now.” Such a dramatic shift and most did not even see it happen. That is when the challenges began.
God asked me what I thought about this shift in vocabulary so I sat with it for a minute. I came to realize that I felt at home the whole time. Not just on that mountain property, but in the hotel at launch, on the first plane ride, I even realized that I felt just as home in my tent at training camp. “Why?” God asked me, “Why do you feel like these places are home?” Wow, good question.
I looked for answers and at once came to the conclusion that it must be because I am with my squad and they are just like my family, so wherever I am with my “family” that must be “home.” Right? “Why do you call these people family? You’ve only known them for a couple months? You are right, they are your family, but why?” Another fantastic question, God.
So after much reflection, prayer, and seeking of the Lord on these two concepts I have come to a conclusion for now, and that conclusion is: I don’t know!
I don’t know why I call these strange and unfamiliar places home, or why I call these people family so readily. I know that this IS home and they ARE family to me, but at the moment, I couldn’t tell you a good reason why. I do however have a promise from God on the matter, “I’ll tell you if you keep asking.” In a way, that answer is the most stressful part about all of this. I have spent most of this month asking and I’m told to keep asking. That stress, and a little bit of anger honestly, were my initial reactions, but then I realized two things; the first, He said He would tell me so I know that the asking will not be in vain. The second, I have been invited into a deeper relationship. I’m not seeking some worldly idea of family and home, I am invited to seek the Lord’s understanding of these two things and once I get that understanding He has promised I will know Him better. That is very exciting if you ask me!
Where this challenge will take me I don’t know yet, but you better believe that when I do, I’ll write about it. So follow this blog and look for the update!
