If we’re being real, for a guy who has said that he wants to live a life that demands an explanation, I’ve often found myself striving to live a life that requires none.
Often times in mixed martial arts, when a grappling heavy fighter gets hit or rocked, they have a tendency to shoot for a takedown or they start reaching for the clinch. It’s because it’s what they know. It’s what they are comfortable with. It’s their background. They start grasping for the thing they’re most comfortable with.
Coming back from the World Race was terrible. It was painful and confusing and it left in a place of “what do I do now”? And if I’m honest, I left me rocked. Life hit me in the mouth when I got back from my time around the world, and I didn’t know what to do next.
And I started desperately reaching for what I knew. Whether it was friends or habits or comforts, I got hit in the mouth. And I tried to take this opponent down by myself. With what I knew.
And as you might have guessed, I desperately failed. Instead of taking a second, breathing, moving into a safe place and recording m, I reached out to grab a hold of SOMETHING that made sense.
(Insert things we run to these days: jobs, business, distraction, relationships etc etc)
And I’m being completely honest. I didn’t want to leave again. This amazingly God-breathed door that opened for me to intern as a leader for Adventures in Missions and then intern at G42 leadership academy in Mijas Spain was daunting to me. Because if the growth I experienced on the world Race was radical…what was this going to be like? This was a huge step towards my calling. This was a step into discipleship and leadership and it scared me so badly I started looking around to settle. I looked for reasons to ignore it. Reasons to stay. The friends I had made in Georgia and had grown to love and hold dear, the prospect of school and work and a relationship…and it all required zero explanation. I don’t have to explain ‘why’. And in fact…I can do all of that on my own. I can reach out and grab and wrestle it to the ground. And it all makes sense.
And that is a place where I’m completely reliant on myself and I place the voice of the Lord second.
Now I need to be clear; for a lot of people, they are living fully in the Spirit and in their calling here in the states and in college. They are pursuing the Lord in the workplace and in their relationships, they are seeking the Lord in their own journeys and that’s amazing. And I might have gotten distracted-confused even. I was still in pain and I wanted to know what to do with it. And for some inexplicable reason, I tried to make it about ME and what I needed to do for MYSELF.
Instead of trusting and walking in the faith that took me 30,000 miles around the globe.
I got punched in the mouth, but this time, I’m choosing to recover and trust and step out into faith again. I’m choosing to not grab for what I know and instead fight for what is good and uncomfortable.
So here’s what’s going on in this little declarative blog I got going.
I’m heading to Africa for 5ish weeks. There I’ll be interning under Megan Parham with R squad, discipling, walking alongside and pouring into them over their first debrief in Ghana and Côte d’Ivoire. From their I’ll fly to Mijas Spain to begin school/ministry internship at G42 leadership academy. There; I’ll spend three months in the classroom before leaving for the international mission field again for three more months, before wrapping up curriculum back in Spain. This will be me practicing what I’ve been taught and continuing to bring Kingdom where I walk.
And this journey again will require another huge leap of faith. One that I did not want to take and that I wanted to make all about ME.
I need to partner with YOU to raise $15,000. $2500 for my time in Africa, and $12,500 just about for my time in Spain. Last year, my prayer/financial partners and I brought the gospel to three continents, six countries, and countless villages, bars, streets and homes. We saw women rescued out of sex slavery and oppression, we saw clean water tablets handed out to the children of Haiti, we saw street boys come alive to the gospel, and we saw the Word of God move through South Africa.
And I’m seeking that partnership again. I don’t see this as “support”. This is a partnership that is a two way relationship. I am so blessed to have this opportunity in front me, and even more excited to step into a new season of trust. I get to be the Hands and Feet where I’ll go, and YOU get to be the body here, or whoever you are. It’s a relationship that stands the globe and brings Life all over the world, in more than two places at once. Together we can continue to make a difference and see lives changed. Including mine. I’m so thankful for my partners last year and I humbly ask that this year you would consider partnering with me again.
I desire relationship. This isn’t about the money or the numbers. This is about you and partnering to bring Kingdom to earth. Where you might support me financially, it is my prayer that the story we write together impacts the makeup of eternity. Together we can bring Kingdom. Will you step out with me again?
