First off, let’s get a few things out of the way. Georgia humidity might be an offense in the sight of the Lord, the bugs are horrible, and bucket showers take a close second to stepping on legos. Also the only thing that changes more than the weather was me constantly looking for dry socks.
All this to say I had some of the best days of my life during that 12 day span in Georgia.
Now I could go into detail about the daily sessions of teaching and reflection and practical training needed to live life for 9 months with what’s on your back. I could talk about the amazing ministry teaching we received on how to love on orphans and the broken. I could talk about the music, the laughs, the food, I could even talk about the end of camp when I wanted to cry at the sight of my team separating for the next 50 days.
And If I talked about all that right now(don’t worry I will in the future), I would be missing out at the chance to tell you about my time spent in a basement. I’d be missing out on the chance to give you a glimpse into a moment where I found my peace at the bottom of the ocean.
So as the bugs and birds hummed and created their orchestra outside, as the humidity made our eyelids glisten, and all 50 people of squad O smelled like a mixture of Old Spice, bug spray and chacos- we all sat on the floor of the cool, perfect basement of the Adventures in Missions Lodge/HQ. And as we sat there a tangible pause descended over the room. See we had been whisked away from session to session, activity to activity, and one moment of emotional breakdown to another; so this was a moment where we all could just be still. This was a time dedicated to bring us to a quiet place to seek peace and wisdom in the Lord and we were being coached through it. Stillness.
And for those of you who know me I hate being still. I’m horrible at it. My mind is always going to what’s next. My mind is always running off in someway to keep it occupied or productive. And in this basement, breathing in and out again, focused on finding a quiet place in my mind…I got frustrated. I couldn’t settle my mind much less my soul to be still before God. I was sleepy, it was hot out, I hadn’t eaten anything green in days. All this is crashing through my mind when the advice comes from our coach: pick one word to associate with God to bring your mind back to square one. And I even got distracted with that. I got distracted trying to focus. I apologize to anyone reading this: I’m laughing typing it don’t worry I know it’s insane.
And so I thought of my happy place. I thought about how some of the greatest moments in my life have taken place in the waves. The beach, the sea, the sunset, all of it was amazing to me. You see at the beach, on the edge of the surf; I always pictured the little waves was a spot where you could play with God. I thought about how when the waves would gently lap to your feet, maybe the Father was there and playing in the sand with you. and if you look out over the water, the sheer power of the ocean was so immense and terrifying. The ocean has sunk ships, swallowed islands, held creatures we have never seen before, and covers the earth. All that-to gently lap over my toes.
And I thought that in the middle of something so powerful like the ocean, there are a few things that don’t move. Rooted in the ocean are anchors to steady ships. It hit me, my word. That thing that would bring me back to ease in my mind. Anchor. To willingly attach myself to it and surrender to its steadfast nature, to dive deep and live attached to it at all times. And with it’s security comes freedom.
In my life, my hectic and ever shifting heart and mind, I had found my anchor. And it was in Christ. It was the love of the people around me, the intimacy I had begun to find with Christ, and the excitement that I would be taking this around the world with me. And in the middle of this season after training camp, when the World Race is right around the corner(50 days), I still have affairs to square away, medication to get, finances to put in order, fund raise another $4000 before I leave, missing the teammates and family I had made at training camp; in the middle of all of this there was peace. A stillness entered my mind for the first time because I let it. I surrendered and let go of the need to do.
Funny how God works. Funny how God brought together 42 strangers to go to the nations and love on those who need it and to love each other. Funny how God is doing work in me by shutting all other doors but the ones that lead to spreading the Good News every day. I have work to do, a long way to go, and miles to fly…but I found my Anchor. I found hope and rest and assurance and mental calm…in a basement.
