One of my life-long struggles is that I lead a life of independence, rather than a life in dependence on the Lord. When I am led by the flesh instead of the Spirit, my inclination is to remix Carrie Underwood’s song and demand “Jesus give back the whee-EEL!” Before the World Race was even a blip on my radar, I was praying for the opportunity to step out in faith and live in utter reliance on God. I thought being called to the World Race was THE answer to that prayer. I had to depend on God to say yes, and I knew that embarking on this endeavor would continue to bring me into opportunities that would directly confront my impulses to have control. And while all of that is certainly true, there was a glaring flaw in my perspective:
I saw the World Race as the only opportunity to live in dependence on God, when God wants me to live that way every. single. day.
My perspective was that I had to completely change my geographic location to experience radical dependence, when radical dependence found me in the comfort of my own bed as I cried out to the Lord from the depths of my spirit in grief. When my mom passed away last year, dependence was (and has been) my only option. I can’t seem to escape my pressing need for God’s presence and provision.
Time spent outside of our comfort zones and through traumatic experiences can increase the number and magnitude of opportunities to live in dependence on God, but they are not the only times we are called to live in dependence. Experiencing difficulty in the most familiar of places has brought to my attention that this “in dependence” lifestyle is something I have largely ignored for the majority of my life, despite it being essential to my relationship with God. It’s one of the great ways God turns what I think I know upside-down: the easier life is, the harder it can be to depend on God, but when things get hard, it is a whole lot easier for me to remember my desperate need for Him.
What is God teaching me about what living in dependence looks like? Well, to name a few:
- Denying my desires, plans, and expectations of what my life will look like (Luke 9:23)
- Following where God leads, even (and especially) when I don’t know where He’s leading (see: Abraham leaving Canaan to an unknown Promised Land)
- Surrendering to God’s plans (sometimes instead of changing my circumstances, He uses my circumstances to change me)
- Accepting His daily bread (accepting how and when He fulfills my needs)
- Trusting Him at His word, believing He is faithful (see the entire Bible? I don’t think I can pick a favorite example; it seems every page is dripping with His faithfulness. Just crack it open and before long you’ll find a dozen or so!)
- Spending time with Him, getting to know Him better, building intimacy with Him, growing accustomed to the sound of His voice
- Walking through my day aware of Jesus’s constant presence with me. When I walk into my boss’s office for a meeting? He comes too. When I cook dinner with my sister? He’s right there, smelling the deliciousness. When I sit at my desk, struggling to write blogs I think are worthy enough to post? There He is, reassuring me that I am enough.
While my heart is ballooning with anticipation over the amazing things God will do on this journey, I choose to start living in dependence now, instead of waiting until I’m living out of a backpack and sleeping in a tent.
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Abba,
May we continue to live in dependence on you while we live out our daily lives. Let me be a woman who relies more heavily on you than on her own abilities. You call me strong, teach me what it means to be strong in surrender. Draw close to me, it is easier to trust you when I feel you near.
Amen
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FUNDRAISING UPDATE
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I still have around $4,000 left to raise! Check out the exciting upcoming events below!
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DESSERT DASH & SILENT ART AUCTION
Sunday, April 22 @ 2pm-6pm
Life Pointe Community Church in Mooresville
Join us for tasty treats and pretty paintings!
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MISSION MONDAY
Monday, May 14 7:30am-4:30pm
Coffeehouse Five in Greenwood
Stop by for a drink or treat and part of the proceeds will go towards my funds!
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WHERE’S MEGS? CALENDARS
Order before April 28
$15 each
6.5″x8.5″ Calendars that tells you where my squad and I are each month of the year starting in August.
Contact me with orders.
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