There is this song called Reckless Love that is so beautifully performed by Cory Asbury. You can listen to it here:
YouTube – Reckless Love – Cory Asbury
The first time I heard it was at Training Camp. Wow, did it wreck me.
The thought of anyone loving me that way, pursuing me that way, really truly giving himself up to fight for me even though I didn’t deserve it, just the attempt to comprehend that would leave me sobbing. It is exactly what the lyrics say: the overwhelming, never ending, reckless love of God.
Then I met him.
I was serving at the homeless shelter here in Malaysia and started a conversation with one of the men who came for lunch.
He told me that it was his first time at the center, that he had spent the last two years in Thailand, and that it was a lot harder to find money here. He shared how he talked to his brother about being hungry and his brother told him to come there for a meal.
I told him about the World Race, shared that I was going to Thailand next month, and asked more about what his time in Thailand was like..
Then I asked about what he did there for work.
“Disco!” He said while making small dance gestures.
I chuckled.. “Disco?”
“Yeah! Massage… you know women..”
“Massage..?” Now I’m thinking he was a masseuse! But he went into talking about coming to disco, having a few drinks, paying and bringing her back the next day.
Let me preface this by saying that the language gap can cause for some confusing situations.. sometimes you have to just step out and say exactly what you’re thinking to get the proper clarification.
The friendly smile on my face froze in my confusion and I filtered my words as carefully as I could as they fell out of my mouth.
“I’m sorry… are you saying ..you sold women?”
His smile got a little wider and he chuckled as as he very clearly said “Yes! ..uh sorry?”
“Uhhh okay!” Before I could even process the conversation taking place, I honestly felt some sort of ugly comfort in the fact that this man was now hungry. But as quickly as the thought came in, the Holy Spirit shed light onto that thought and showed me just how hateful it was.
I asked him about the women he prostituted.. if they had families, if they had children. Yes.
He said that since he left Thailand a few of the women have even reached out to him asking him to come back, telling him that there is no money without him.
As the thoughts in my mind slowly dwindled down into nothing, someone started praying over the food. The man who literally sold women in Thailand was standing next to me boldly saying “Amen, Amen” in response to the thanks being prayed for the food.
As thoughts came in towards the hypocritical sinner standing next to me, the Lord gently reminded me that I was just as much a hypocritical sinner and that He loves this man just as much as He loves me.
I politely excused myself, walked away to serve food, and quickly escaped to the nearby stairwell to try and process what just happened.
I’ve thought about prostitutes before, I’ve even thought about the “Johns” who purchase their services and knew that they need the Lord too.. but I had never even thought about the men who pimp out the girls.
I had never even really thought of the word “pimp” in its proper context before.. and all of the suppen I was trying to figure out how to love one.
I knew that this man needed to see God’s love but I didn’t know how to actually show him. I repeatedly prayed asking for God to tell me how to love him, what to say to him, when I should say it to him.
As I sat there, I realized that the longer I sat, the less likely he would be there when I built up the courage to go back out.
I got up and walked out just to find an almost empty dining room, he was nowhere to be found.
I was slightly relieved, slightly upset.
I didn’t want to miss out on likely my only opportunity to speak light and grace into his life.. but I had to let go of that worry too.
Then I heard the lyrics to Reckless Love coming out of my own mouth.
There’s no shadow you won’t light up,
Mountain you won’t climb up
Coming after me
I kept singing but this time God changed my lyrics..
There’s no wall you won’t kick down,
Lie you won’t tear down
Coming after him
Oh the overwhelming
Never ending
Reckless love of God
Oh it chases him down,
Fights until he’s found,
Leaves the 99
He couldn’t earn it,
He doesn’t deserve it,
Still you give yourself away
Oh the overwhelming,
Never ending,
Reckless love of God.
And the same song that overwhelms me with gratitude for God’s never ending love for me took on a new light.
God loves him in the same overwhelming way He loves me. God chases his heart the same way He chases mine and there is nothing heaven would like more than to see him turn and run into repentance.
Since then, I realized not only was my temporary gratitude for his hunger hateful, it was also foolish. I pray that he does find provision here in Malaysia and that it has nothing to do with prostitution. I pray that the attraction and temptation to work in the sex trade would completely fall free from him and that a lack of resources like money wouldn’t draw him back to the trade. I pray that he can meet people here that can come along side him and walk with him through the struggles he’s facing to find the freedom found only in Jesus.
God’s love is so reckless.. we continually let Him down and He continually pours out more love. What more could we ask for?
I’d love to point you to some different perspectives of prostitution that the Lord has shown two of my teammates: Melissa (Prostitutes) and Bethany (Johns).
“Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.”
Luke 15:7 ESV
