The Lord’s Portion. We hear that all the time in our Christian culture. Fulfill the Lord’s portion. One place the Lord’s portion comes from is Deuteronomy 32:9; it says “But the Lord’s portion is his people, Jacob his allotted heritage.” We are the Lord’s portion. And we are placed here on earth to do the portion of work that the Lord has for us today. Just today.
Over the past few months’ people have been telling me to do just the portion my Father has for me today, because I try to do it all. I’m consistently told ‘Mack all you have to do today is fulfill the Lord’s portion for you to the best of your ability and that is all.’ That’s all I have to do. I don’t have to do it all in one day.
Abba has been slowly taking my plans (slowly because I have been slowly letting him) and showing me his, and they’re better. They are always better. When I’ve spent time in prayer asking him what to do and he tells me, I get excited and stop asking. I try to take over and do it my way, which doesn’t allow me to fulfill what the Lord has for me today, to the best of my ability.
I was, and more often than not still am, trying to do more than the Lord wants me to in any given day. I’ve been realizing lately that my motivations for what I’m doing mean a heck of a lot. I have to check my heart to see why I’m doing what I’m doing; and I’m seeing I don’t always love my selfish answers (thankfully my God is merciful and patient; he’s showing me what it means to have pure motivations). We live in a society where the world is telling us, and me as a woman, to do everything that I possibly can in this day, do it all perfectly, and don’t look like you had to try hard to accomplish it. Abba has been trying to help me see what I did today through his eyes, instead of how the world views it. If I did just one thing, and he says it’s good enough, then it’s good enough.
I feel a lot of pressure to get things done in one try, and I’m pretty good at it. I’m a one and done kind of woman; a ‘one trip from the car with my grocers cutting into my arms’ kind of woman if that means I don’t have to make two trips. I think if I sit with Jesus one time, or three times, that my problem will be fixed, that I don’t have to keep asking questions, but he doesn’t usually work that way with me.
His portions for me are smaller, because he knows that I’m not in a place to handle a lot without wanting to perform to do it well, which I still struggle with. Some days Abba doesn’t even tell me what he wants me to do, because he just wants me to rest with him, to sit in his presence and not try to perform. He wants to take my burdens from me, his yoke is easy and his burden is light, so much lighter than what I try to put upon myself day in and day out. He wants me to rest.
In the midst of all of this, I still felt I had to come home from the race with my ish all handled and worked out. I’d come back with a big pretty bow on it, all taped up and fixed, but that isn’t realistic. These are things I’ll probably be working on my whole life, and things I can’t fix, only things that the Lord can heal if I choose to let him.
And not having things finished doesn’t diminish my worth. It doesn’t mean the Abba isn’t pleased and joyful with me. The lord has asked me to do what he has asked me to do, and it is most always different from what I think, and that is okay. I only need to do his portion for today to the best of my ability, and that is all. Because at the end of this day, when I do what he has as best as I can, I have been faithful, and he is pleased; whether that means tackling a lie, scrubbing walls, evangelizing to locals, or simply resting in him, he is pleased.
Matthew 25:23
“His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.”
Matthew 11:28-30
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
Love and miss you all,
Mack
p.s. sorry for my recent absence, we are currently in Siem Reap, Cambodia, and I promise to tell you all about it soon!
