Ever since I can remember I’ve been a people pleaser. Every time someone would ask me to help them lead a group or volunteer at a camp or mow a yard, I would say yes in order to make that person happy. What I didn’t realize is that this tendency I had would turn into so much more. Because I have always made myself available to everyone I meet and always said yes, I’ve given people a reason to expect things from me. People expect me to come to every event I’m invited to, or to agree to help in every situation I’m asked to help in, and it sucks. Much of it is my own doing, not setting healthy boundaries, but I put so much pressure on myself to live up to other people’s expectations that I feel as though everything I do has to be perfect. If I don’t say the right words or do the right things, then someone might think less of me. What if I say “no” to this person? Will they think I don’t care about them? What if I don’t perform up to the standards that people think I should?
I’m so fed up with it. I’ve been living with the fear of failure, not because of failure itself, but because of what people will think of me if I fail. This fear of other people’s opinions has kept me from walking in true freedom given by the Father. I’m done with people pleasing. I’m done trying to live up to other people’s expectations of how I should act, what I should say, what I should or shouldn’t do.
As this has been weighing on me lately, I’ve come to realize that what other people expect of me doesn’t matter. The expectations people have placed on me don’t define me. What does define me is the fact that I am a Son of God. I’ve been adopted into His family and He loves me and is proud of me. So if I let people down, so what? If I don’t say yes to everything people ask of me and they look down on me for it, who cares? The Father’s opinion of me is the only one that matters. Only His.
