Waking up in Draganesti-Olt, Romania our day starts out as any other. Crawling out of bed, down the stairs, brushing teeth, searching for breakfast. Its not that different. But as the sun rises so do the rest of the people. There are twenty-two of us living under one roof. Twenty-two.
Everyone spreads out. Some are showering, some eating, some reading, some exercising, some drawing, some sleeping in as late as possible. Then there’s me. I’m standing there, coffee in hand, like a zombie wondering how I got here and how these people are capable of making so much noise.
It’s all squad month! Meaning the three small teams we were split up into last month are now together in one place serving our ministry partner as a whole. It’s like living with all of your siblings- if you were to have twenty-two brothers and sisters.
In a world full of people I enjoy resting in the peaceful stillness of my home. This month my home is the exact opposite. Neither peaceful nor still, I flee to rooms with no people, embracing the solitude.
The peace, the joy, the stillness that I long for is nonexistent this month. At least, that’s what I believed for a hot minute. Until the Lord, in all His goodness, shined down on my soul and filled it with His love.
Though I share a room with four other people, they rarely spend time in the room. There’s my physical room of calm.
But it is in that physical room that the Lord has reveled another place for me. That place isn’t in this world, but it is where I can find all the peace, stillness, and joy I could ever need. And I can go to it anytime.
Since before I left America I have been seeking a way to be alone with God. A place I can escape to to just be with the Lord. A resting place, if you will. But it wasn’t until the Lord gave my squadmate a vision just a few days ago that I realized the Lord had created that place for us.
Y’all, the Lord loves me so much it’s so exciting!
It’s a deep forest with an abundance of leaves. It’s kind of dark, but the leaves are vivid. There’s a big log that a person is running to or jumping over. There’s also someone sitting more relaxed in the forest.
(I love that the Lord knows me so well as to speak with nature. I love nature!)
So, after pondering this for a little while I feel like this is what the Lord reveled. The depth of the forest is the Lord’s love and goodness. The darkness is all of my frustration in trying to be close with Him that’s actually creating obstacles preventing me from being close with Him. The log is also an obstacle. Something that I know I need to jump over or break through but that I keep sitting on. Each leaf is so bright because that’s how I feel when I think about the multitude of things I am thankful to Him for. The numerous amount of leaves also represent His infinite love for me. And it is the Lord who is sitting relaxed in the midst of the forest. He’s waiting. Waiting to sit with me as we talk about all the things. Hallelujah.
In my journaling this morning I wrote that the Lord is so so good to us. This month the entire atmosphere is heavy. It’s a struggle to even wake up some mornings, but the Lord is remaining faithful. He has provided us with so much joy and laughter. Over the most random, dumb things. We laugh and we love each other because the Lord loves us so much. It’s that love that isn’t just getting me through this month, but is actually allowing me to begin thriving.
He is so good! And you are so dearly loved!
