On Wednesday, my team and our sister team’s ministry was outreach. Our host wanted us to go on a prayer walk, specifically praying for the women of the community.
–Recently we have gotten multiple opportunities to minister specifically to women, including, setting up a nail salon for the day and going to Mother’s Club! Our vision for everything we have done has revolved around worthiness, beauty, and strength. It has been such a blessing giving a group of people who are looked down upon and disregarded, a chance to be seen, heard, and loved.–
We spent time worshiping and praying for the women together before we started our walk. During worship I became extremely angry at God. Since I got to the Dominican, I have felt so far from God and more alone than ever. I had been praying for so many simple things, one of them being the ability to pray out loud (ever since I was little, I have hated praying out loud. It makes me panic and feel so uncomfortable and I trip over my words and afterwards, I just feel stupid and like my prayer has no impact. My team has received the opportunity to pray over so many people, and every time they ask me to, I freak out and force somebody else to). God hadn’t spoken to me or answered any of these little prayers, so I was just beyond angry at Him. He promises to meet us where we are, and He wasn’t doing that.
We all split into small groups and went in different directions. As Lucy, Sydney, Kyla, and I walked out of the property, Kyla took us down a road that we hadn’t walked down before. The three of them were walking and praying over the women in each house, meanwhile…I was fuming in my head and couldn’t even think straight. I was barely able to ask God to put me in a better mood because I knew how selfish I was being not praying for these women. We kept on walking and I was able to say short, one sentence prayers, when suddenly a woman called us over. We went through the gate and walked down a path to this lady’s house. Her name was Carmen, and she immediately pulled us into her home and arranged chairs for all of us. After Carmen told us many stories (none of which we understood because our Spanish is muy mal), Lucy asked, in charades, if we could pray for her.
I realized that from the moment we entered the gate, my head was cleared. While I was talking and listening to her, I was so calm and happy. Lucy prayed, and when she finished, Kyla began to pray, and then I prayed, and Sydney closed us out… AND THEN I REALIZED I PRAYED OUTLOUD. I didn’t even think twice about it! I felt comfortable praying and was at peace when I said “amen”. I began to freak out! As we continued walking, we got invited into another house… and I prayed out loud AGAIN!!!!
He met me where I was-like He promises. Our relationship is going to be built eventually, but relationships take time. God knew that I needed a reminder that He is listening and present. He provided, thank you Jesus!
