The room was cold and quiet. Sitting in a metal chair with my knees to my chest and my head bowed I broke down in tears. Strategically placed around the room, the rest of my squad sat in silence as they finished up reading and signing. And there I was; cold, broken and crying. But it was in that moment that everything started coming together.
There were many challenges during training camp; mental, physical and emotional. Before training camp my biggest worry was the 2.2 mile hike in 38 minutes with your fully loaded backpack on. Let me tell you now, that was probably the easiest part of the week (and it wasn’t easy at all).
We dug into our struggles, our shame and past regrets. We stood together as a squad and stood up for our sisters, and we broke down into tears; all in our own timing. We grew more in those 10 days together, than I have in years.
The thing about the struggles and fear that you never realize is that you can hide them from everyone you know; family, friends, and even your mentors. But you can not hide them from God. I think I can speak for everyone when I say that we all experience a specific moment during training camp; the moment that everything changes.
In that moment, you finally let go. Let go of everything that you have held inside, let go of the doubts that you keep replaying; and you leave everything at the foot of the cross. In that moment, I put all of my trust in Jesus Christ; and I met the love of my life at training camp. Jesus is there for us y’all. He carried a heavy cross weighed down by all of our sins, and He died on it. For us.
Before arriving to training camp, I was so excited to “Go into the world” and minister. Now that training camp is over and the countdown is on, I am honored to be a part of 5th generation C Squad, and I can not wait to serve with the wonderful women God has placed in my life for the next year.
