This past summer I was a mammoth. Not in some cringe-worthy, metaphorical sense, but a full-fledged, terrifying mammoth. At least this was the case for the campers I led, during a game we aptly called, “Mammoth Hunt.” Every Tuesday afternoon at 2:15 sharp without fail – much like a werewolf – I would become a Mammoth before my campers very eyes. After which, they would come outside and battle to get their beloved counselor back.
This fight would go on for a seemingly endless thirty minutes and was a mixed drink of one part soap and ninety-nine parts determined campers (sometimes dead set on putting you in pain). As the battle raged, I would find myself locking eyes with terrified first graders who just wanted someone to comfort them, but I was a mammoth, incapable of feelings. Later I would be put in a staring contest with a multitude of fifth graders all trained in the deadly art of flailing wildly, and would realize the totality of my fate, again I was a mammoth, so I accepted my inevitable downfall with a series of battle cries and hidden tears. The battle would rage until defeated; and I would again arise as their counselor, here to comfort them, through the scars from the fight before.
A year before this moment, I would have never imagined that I would be put in a situation such as this. I never thought to myself, “You know, one day I am going to act like a mammoth for my job.” But that’s just what God does. He puts us in situations that we never thought could exist, situations within which we have no control (you soon realize you have no control when all four of your limbs are seemingly being ripped from your body, during a skirmish with fourth graders). But I think that it’s beautiful when we realize that we are called as Christians to relinquish control to an ever-present creator, in an ever-changing world.
So why the World Race? Why now? What about my future career? How will I celebrate Christmas and Thanksgiving? What about college? Will I still have my friends when I come back? What will my Mom do while I’m gone?
These are all things I am still figuring out, and questions that plague my mind to this day. These issues must not be ignored, nor should they prevent my acceptance and seizure of God’s will. I have been uniquely created and gifted to serve, as a student of Christ, a designer, and incurable talkaholic. This pedigree was somewhat made on my own, but there are aspects that I could not help. Such as: being born to a middle-class family, living in the south, being a millennial, living in the time and place I am right now, being a middle child, etc. I know that all of this can and will be used by God if I am willing to humble myself and submit to his will.
This past summer I felt a call. A call to go. A call to serve. A call to grow. At first, I thought nothing of it, but I realized that a call is not an opportunity to refuse, but rather an opportunity to step out in obedience. I firmly believe that I have never felt called to full-time missions for the rest of my life, but I feel called to full-time missions NOW. Having just changed majors from Architecture to Graphic Design (Which could and probably will be its own blog post), being single (therefore not having someone to rely on me staying at college), being young, and most importantly being a Christian, I feel that the time for me to serve is now. As such I am ready to put my life on hold and pursue God with abandon in order to grow into the man that God has meant for me to become.
Abandon does not come naturally to me, but adventure does. Ever since I was a kid, I have been blessed with a bad case of wanderlust. My heart naturally seeks out adventure and begs to wander. But, the World Race is not a means of vacationing and exploration for nine months. Rather the Race is a mission to grow, learn about myself, further the kingdom of God, deal with my past, and completely trust God in ways I never have before. I will be leaving the comforts I take for granted daily, thrust into places unknown and situations untold. In terms of the Hero’s Journey I will be “crossing the threshold” – leaving the ordinary world and entering a new region or condition with unfamiliar rules and values. For me, I will be leaving America (for the first time) and be thrust into Cambodia, Thailand, Ethiopia, Guatemala, and Honduras. During this time, I will be tested, I will be uncomfortable, and I will have doubts. Because of this, I face two options, quit now or go through and seize the opportunity set before me. In my heart, I know that I am ready to seize this adventure, and I pray that my soul will ache to be used by God for his glory.
A verse constantly at the forefront of my mind is Lamentations 3:37 “Who has spoken and it came to pass, unless the Lord has commanded it?” How wonderful is it to know that our creator has moved with his own hand and orchestrated all the events within this fleeting thing we call life? How terrifying is it to know that what happens is out of our control? Is this comforting or is it domineering?
God has orchestrated a plan for my life, and I must be willing to follow it. Through my past experiences and my current situation, God has prepared me for whatever is to come. And though I am unsure of what will happen this next year, I know that God will ultimately be the one who is in control of what is happening. And I think that is beautiful.
Till next time,
Jonny Mocek
