Sorry it’s been so long! My mind has been in about a billion different places these last 2 months, so it’s been hard to type up a blog. However, my time in Peru has given me some time to reflect and process my time in Chile, and I’m able to see the really good moments, along with some really hard ones.
Ministry the first month involved going to a school in the mornings to help teach English. I built some really amazing relationships with the kids there, played endless games of “Down by the Bank,” and had some great conversations about all their favorite things! In the afternoons, we would teach English classes at the church to the community of Recoleta (right outside Santiago). It was really busy. However, our last month, the schools were out for Holiday so our ministry became very sporadic and usually we had no idea what the day would hold. That last month was mainly building relationships with the church members and joining in on all of their activities. My teammate, Emma, even wrote up a modern day nativity play that we all got to perform, and it was awesome! But probably my favorite part of the whole two months was the last week. My team and I split up and went out into the streets of Recoleta to do street evangelism/ask the Lord who He wanted us to go talk to and pray for. It was so cool to meet everyone the Lord brought across our path and show the power of prayer to them even if it was in a different language. The Lord keeps teaching me that he works beyond language, but it’s a lesson I have to learn everytime we change countries.
During Chile, the Lord also took me to some really hard places. He humbled me immensely. He showed me my great capacity for sin and failure, but in that, I discovered more than I ever have about His grace (a concept I have and probably always will struggle with). But in bringing me low, the Lord has showed me how big and trustworthy He is. He has brought me to a place of dependence as a result of my new found humility, and I trust Him more than I ever have. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 has been super impactful-
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
I’m still learning how to boast in my weakness. It’s a work in progress… and I definitely went into a “pit” when I became aware of my pride. I said yes to the hard things and wrestled with them, but it has also been hard to climb out of the pit. The Lord has asked me to look at my weaknesses and mess and still believe that He loves me, believe His grace covers it, and believe that I’m still worthy to be called His child.
I honestly don’t want to. Even though it’s true and that is what His Word says, it feels too hard to believe it. So, instead of trying with all my might to embrace it, I simply asked the Lord to allow me to believe it. The cool thing is- He did! That has been the most amazing thing about my journey with trust. I realize that most of the things I worry about, control, or try fix, aren’t actually my things to carry. I pick up loads that were never mine in the first place. Instead of fixing and working my way out of shame, I sit and “drown” in a sense. I let the weakness and failure in because that really is when the Lord is strong and speaks the loudest. It allows me to take Him out of the box I put Him, and more importantly, it builds trust! It’s so backwards, but that is truly how the Lord intended it. He never asks us to did this all alone. He just asks for trust and dependence.
So not only has the Lord been showing me my weakness emotionally and spiritually…but also physically! I apparently ate some bad chicken and didn’t hydrate well enough on our way to Peru because when I got 11,000 feet up into the mountains, I got severe altitude sickness and salmonella! So my first week in Peru didn’t start off great, but now I’m 20 minutes outside downtown Cusco with 9 other girls. All of us currently have lice (gotta love community), but we are learning how to love and serve each other well as we wash each others heads with lice shampoo that doesn’t work and comb through every last strand of hair on our heads.
Peru is a beautiful country filled with a lot of culture and history. Our ministry hosts are great, and I can’t wait to share the ministry that we are doing here! The Lord continues to grow and stretch me emotionally, spiritually, and even physically (I still walk 50 ft. and am completely out of breath. I don’t know if it is still an altitude problem or if I’m just horribly out of shape. There’s a strong possibility it’s the later). Thank you for all your prayers and support! They mean more than you know. The race has been hard but also the best 5 months. The Lord is so so good, and I continue to realize and see that every single day.
