30 girls. 6 fans. 1 room. As the blistering sun sets for the evening, the humidity stays. Sweat droplets roll down our sticky foreheads after our shower, resulting in the general consensus being that pajamas are a joke. Sleeping pads irregularly lined up between exploding backpacks make for chaos when trying to find your bright blue toothbrush. The chalk white floors are filled with a mixture of hair, dirt, ants, and sometimes, your toothbrush.
After much struggle, I put on my sleeping mask, plug in my earphones, and allow the sweat from my back gently settle into my green sleeping pad, resulting in a soothing squish and heat rash. Sleeping allows the pandemonium of the world around me to stop, and for a brief moment my body gets the rest it needs.
Then, I hear it. As I lift my heavy head off the slobbery, striped pillow, my frazzled mind attempts to make sense of this strange noise. The woman’s voice was soft, initially. Gradually, the chanting grew louder and more intense. My heart began racing, becoming in sinc with fast-paced, monotone Khmer words. My droopy eyes led me first to my paint-splattered watch, which read 4:02 am, then to the sky, where the dark, heavy clouds covered the electric stars and crescent moon. It was an all-consuming feeling; as if the voice was piercing my soul and the deep gray clouds were containing the fear. With an anxious heart, I hid under my smelly covers, attempting to fall back asleep. The next morning, our minds were put at ease with an explanation, but our hearts were still jumbled. Pchum Ben week had commenced.
Pchum Ben week is an extremely important holiday in Cambodia. Nearly every business and ministry close for families to travel back to their homelands where their ancestors lived. Khmer people believe during this time the gates of hell are opened and the spirits of their relatives are let out. These spirits visit Pagodas looking for food from their living relatives. If they find no food that has been sacrificed for their sake, it is believed the living family will be cursed.
The darkness that consumes the country during this week is tragic. As fear instills every person, spiritual activity increases more than usual. While we sought after the Lord fervently for peace, the heaviness sunk deep as our bodies jolted awake every morning at 4 am.
While relief swept over our squad when the Pchum Ben finished, we knew the Lord specifically orchestrated our first week here to be during this holiday. We understood the seriousness of spiritual warfare and the importance of seeking the Lord for our strength and wisdom. We knew that the Lord was preparing us for so much more. Amidst the fear during Pchum Ben, my squad and I were privileged to bless the Khmer people by painting murals in a Buddhist school and pulling over our wagons to intentionally care and love anyone we came in contact with.
The Lord is good. And so, so faithful. As I reminisce on this past week, the Lord reminded me of 2 Timothy 1:7, “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.”
