In Romania, I went through a season of questioning God. I didn’t ever doubt His existence, but I was a little skeptical. I wanted to know all of the “why” answers to His mysteries. I knew that if my parents had been Buddhist, I would probably be Buddhist right now. If my parents had been Mormon, I would very likely be following Mormon teachings. It’s in our nature to trust our parents and believe that what they know is best. Although I knew that my religion was my own, I wanted to know all of the answers that backed up what I believed. So I spent a lot of time asking the Lord all of the questions.
“Why are you better than other religions?”
“Why is Christianity so predominant?”
“Why should I believe that Christianity is the one and only true religion?”
“What about other religions? They all think that they’re correct, also. What gives me the right to tell them that they’re wrong and I’m right?”
While the Lord spoke these things into me in Romania and Ukraine, I don’t think that I fully grasped the truth of the Lord until I got to Chile. The Lord told me all about the truth of who He is through nature. He answered all of my questions without ever needing to go into detail about everything that was going through my brain.
One night, I sat on top of a mountain and watched the sunset with my teammates. I wondered how anyone could believe that my God wasn’t real. I just sat there, in awe of His vastness. I saw the sun go down and watched the sky light up with millions of stars. The fact that He created all of it and He knows the intricate details of each huge star blew my mind. He created all of these crazy things and He knew that we would never fully understand them. He just created them so that we could enjoy their beauty. After trying to comprehend His vastness, I thought about the fact that He knows each person personally. He knows the number hairs on each of our heads. He knows each of our thoughts and our deepest desires. WHATTTT. What a cool guy!!
I finally grasped the fullness of the Lord and the truth of who He is when I laid down my expectations. When I laid down my need to know every answer in order to follow in obedience. I was able to actually understand Him when I stopped thinking so much. When I stopped needing the answers to every question and I found contentment in knowing that I don’t know.
Before we launched, every Racer was given a key on a necklace chain. Each key had a word specific for the person It was being given to. There was a staff at Adventures that spent time praying over each key and asking the Lord for a specific word for each person. Although He didn’t know any of us, the Lord gave Him words that spoke into each person’s journey. Racers spent time praying over their key and asking the Lord how He wanted to speak to us. My Key said truth and, WOW, it was so cool watching that speak into my journey. When we grasped what the Lord was trying to teach us through these keys, we were asked to give them away.
I felt the Lord tugging on my heart to give my key to my ministry host, Ely. I got to learn so much through praying into this word and I’m so excited to hear about her journey of learning what real truth looks like. She was ecstatic to receive this key and I loved being able to watch her wear it.
SIDE NOTE::: WOOOO Thank you to EVERY EVERY supporter!! I’m still ONLY $150 away from being fully funded!! If everyone that reads this blog gives $2 (ONLY $2!!!) I’ll be fully funded! This is essential to allowing me to continue being a missionary overseas! Can you spare $2 to help keep me on the field??
