Sometimes, the glory of the Lord is really easy to see. Sometimes things just go right, and His influence is blatantly obvious. Sometimes everything just goes right and it makes me want to give Him a hug or a high five or something.
This has not been one of those times.
It’s really easy to give God credit for all these good traits He has when our circumstances are also good. But circumstances are fickle things. And sometimes, they aren’t what we want then to be.
The past couple of weeks have been difficult for me. A dear friend of mine passed away back home, I’ve been having weird dreams, ministry has been very difficult, and I’ve just generally felt down and out. Where is God’s goodness in circumstances like these? Where does it go when I can’t feel it? How can I find it again?
Turns out that I found it in a rather unlikely place.
Originally, my team and I were doing ministry in a local middle school, and while the people there were great, our ministry there just didn’t work out. At this point, we were offered the opportunity to help out at a special needs orphanage instead.
I had reservations. I love kids, but I didn’t have a clue what to do with these ones. Most of them can’t talk, and a lot of them can’t walk. What am I supposed to do with them? For the first two days, I had no clue what to do and just felt overwhelmed.
On the third day, I met a 19 year old guy who was able to walk, but only with the help of a brace. When we found out he was praying daily to be able to walk without the brace, we offered to pray for him. He pointed to me. He specifically wanted me to pray for him. Uh, okay.
So I prayed. To my knowledge, God’s never used me to heal anyone before, but I’m always willing to pray. And you know what? He’s still in a brace. But he was still excited that I’d prayed for him, and he grabbed me and my team and insisted on praying for us. It was a simple prayer. He thanked God that we came and asked Him to bless and protect us. Amen.
During that prayer, God opened my eyes to see these kids the way he sees them. As precious souls that He loves dearly.
With this new insight, I walked over to another little boy. He was a 14 year old who could neither talk nor walk, but I started talking to him in my broken Spanish, praying I could bless him in some way.
If anything, the opposite happened. This kid had seen us praying, and he wanted to get in on it. So he put his hands together, closed his eyes, and started praying in what sounded to me like a series of moans and groans. I still don’t have any idea what he said, but my heart broke. Surely this kid, sitting in his wheelchair, lacking fine motor skills and the ability to speak, had more reason than I did to doubt God’s goodness. Yet here he was, praying his heart out over a virtual stranger.
And in one moment, my joy came back to me. And yes, it was still twinged by some sadness, but God’s goodness is so much bigger than our circumstances. And he used two very special, special needs teenagers to remind me of that. Thank you, Lord.
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I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord. Be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord -Psalm 27:13-14
