It’s been pouring nonstop this week and multiple times a week for the last two months. How unusual for LA! It feels good and cleansing to have the rain pour down.
I think about what will happen when I won’t have the luxury of my car and an umbrella and a washer/dryer… I imagine there will be times when I will be soaking wet next year somewhere on the other side of the world and I wonder what will my mood be like? Will I be encouraged or discouraged? We’ll see! Women’s march was yesterday and while I didn’t attend, hearing about the 750K people march in LA alone shows us there is much brokenness, hurt and pain in our world.
I am so excited to go on this adventure and it’s been hard because I’m letting people know in stages when I just want to tell everyone I know and talk about it all the time. I think about it every single day. I haven’t told most people at church yet because I just stepped into a leadership role leading life group and we want to allow a transition period and I haven’t told people at work yet either since I need to keep a steady income …etc.
I’ve been in “let’s create a checklist and start checking things off” mode. I’ve been busy, worrying about this and that:
• researching tax extensions and vaccinations and health insurance policies
• cramming in my annual gynecologist, optometrist, and dentist appointments (while I am still covered under health insurance)!
• got my tetanus booster shot and will need to find a doctor to prescribe a typhoid and possibly rabies or malaria shot along with a yellow fever certificate
• went into REI to get measured to know what kind of backpack size to get : I’m 17 in torso size
• got my passport renewed and 6 extra photos for visas
• gave away my two pet turtles
• bought a lightweight klymit sleeping pad
• read and reread countless packing list blogs
While it is good to get the practical stuff done…My top priority is preparing my heart and my spirit.
I am preparing my heart for this journey and was reminded how important it was at the IHOP onething conference in Kansas city at the end of Dec.
There’s this verse: 1 Corinthians 3:7 that says it’s not important who does the planting or watering but that God makes the seed grow…I want to make sure that I’m not spending my life in vain strife – on things that God does not measure…but focus on the heart: the unseen. And I think it’d be easy to think ‘oh, I will do God’s kingdom starting in August’ and neglect my time of preparation from now to August, which is about 6 months away.
I am reminded of 1 Cor. 13, if I were super charismatic with the languages of the world and angels, or knew everything with the gift of prophecy and knowledge, or if I gave everything I had to the poor and even sacrificed my body …But didn’t love, I will have gained nothing. That really stood out to me when Allen Hood was talking about it; sometimes I get wrapped up in the logistics, I neglect the heart behind things…Like don’t be busy trying to prepare lifegroup but then neglect the relationships.
I am praying for a tender heart so that every thing I do comes out of love, unto love, for love.
I was on the phone with my mom yesterday and she said that I need to prepare for the battleground! I will be going into enemy territory, into a Muslim held 10/40 region, areas that are daily in the news (in a negative way) and I’d be a fool if I didn’t spiritually prepare…like in Ephesians 6: I will need the belt of truth, body armor of God’s righteousness, shoes of peace from the Good news, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation, sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God.
I’ve been encouraged a couple things:
At onething (IHOP KC), it was so cool to hear stories or Muslims dreaming of a man in white: Jesus! It’s astounding because when I served the refugees this summer with Antioch, my church organization, they were were also hearing the same stories of Muslims coming to Jesus in waves and Him personally appearing to them in dreams as a man in white! It reaffirmed my route in the world race to go to the 10/40 window where the majority population is Muslim.
Another thing, it was so affirming to hear the focused sessions on the church and Israel and know that we will be able to go into the Promised land and be the hands and feet of Jesus (and how, as David Pawson says, all the Jews need to know is that Jesus is alive and then they will believe!)
A third confirmation is our church series since Jan, about courageous faith. We’ve been reading Judges 6 &7 and talking about how we can take a courageous leap of faith and put the pressure on God to deliver on his promises and trust in him even when he’s thinning our army.
I invite you to pray for me on the above, that my heart is soft and is getting molded by God to prepare me for this summer.
Love,
Connie
