A compilation of lies, made up facts and dumb questions I’ve said for the sake of preventing emotional (possibly psychological) breakdowns and providing comic relief his month. This is part confession, part pat my own back type of deal.
- Our bedrooms are on the second floor. Cockroaches don’t climb to the second floor. We’re fine.
- We’ve killed 5 cockroaches. They travel in packs of 5. They’re all gone.
- The bigger the cockroach, the more afraid of humans they are.
- In the context of waiting on someone outside of our team- don’t worry; they’re probably just reserving our table at the Olive Garden.
- We’re going through the drive-thru at McDonald’s soon; think about what you want to order. (While in the middle of absolutely nowhere)
- Is that brownies a la mode I smell?
- Do you think Papa John’s delivers out here?
- Did you know if you eat 6 tomatoes a day, your chances of dying goes down 0%?
The list goes on and on, these are just a few silly ones.
Have a great day!
