Yeah, you read that right… I’m an addict.
First, let me give you a little bit of a back story. From July 5th to July 16th, I was at something called Training Camp, which is basically glorified boot camp for the World Race. I got to meet my squad (a group of 45 people that are all going to Haiti, Dominican, Botswana, South Africa, and the Philippines) and my team (a group of 7 people that I’ll be living with and doing ministry with for the 9 months that I’m gone). We got the works: porta-potties, bucket showers, eating weird foods, sleeping in tents, and becoming professional bug exterminators. It was the hardest 11 days of my life, yet the most eye-opening and necessary 11 days of my life.
Okay, back to the part about me being an addict.
Living in the middle of the woods for 11 days straight can do a lot to a person. When I first got to Training Camp, I had been up since 6:00 in the morning, had been traveling all day, and was super tired by the time I stepped off of my plane. Around 3:30 our shuttle bus took all of the Racers to the Adventures in Missions headquarters in Gainesville, Georgia. Dinner time rolled around, and all of the sudden I started to feel super light-headed, sick to my stomach, and sounds became really muffled. Long story short, don’t get dehydrated, kids. It isn’t fun.
Because I was REAL dumb and decided not to drink ANY water that day, I wasn’t able to set my tent up until it was dark out. Great start, I know. Now I was tired, hungry (because I didn’t eat dinner), AND still had to set up a tent in the dark.
PAUSE. I’m not telling you all of these things so that you’ll pity me or feel bad for my situation. Keep reading and find out the “why” behind this little story.
I woke up the next day feeling a lot better, but still recovering. We had a session in the morning, and the rest of the Racers were coming to camp around 5:30. By then I was SUPER pumped to meet my squad, get to know some people, and just hang out with my new family. We had worship that night, and it was AMAZING. Like, so good. I loved it.
Fast-forward to days 2 and 3… I was extremely tired, discouraged, and just fearful in general. I was already sick of being sweaty and sticky all the time, bucket showers were less than glorious, I had killed about 8 gagillion ants by that point, and I was just feeling emotionally and physically drained. I wanted desperately to be back in my bed, sleeping in the A/C, and enjoying my “normal” daily life.
At Training Camp, we also did something called “theme days.” Basically, you eat and dress according to whatever the theme (or culture) is that day. In short, we had to eat a lot of weird foods and wear clothes that made us sweat constantly.
All I wanted was real food that I was used to. I was hot and hungry a lot of the time. I loved my team, but I missed my family; all I could think about was how hard it’s going to be to leave them in September. I also just really wanted some PB&J. Like, really badly. Comfort food is good.
You might be wondering what the heck any of this has to do with me being an addict, but hang in there. I’m gonna tell you.
Being stripped away from everything that I cushion my life with – for example, air conditioning, a bed, a real bathroom, medicine (or a Mom), running water, endless amounts of snacks, etc. – totally wrecked me. I was overwhelmed by having to adapt to a new daily routine (like brushing my teeth with water from a water bottle). It was really, really hard to say the least.
Everything about my first few days in Georgia made me realize that I’m an addict of comfort. I have so many things available to me as a middle-class American that I didn’t even realize I had become addicted to them. I mean, I don’t have a fancy car, I don’t spend a fortune on clothes, and have like 3 pairs of shoes. But I’m so reliant on food, my house, and the freedom to do pretty much whatever I want.
These thoughts caused my mind to start spinning, and I eventually came to the realization that I had been making everything about me. Was I comfortable? Was I clean? Did I have clothes that didn’t smell like butt? Etc. etc. It was all about me: what I needed and what made me feel the most comfortable.
There’s a verse in Matthew chapter 6 that says this: “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money” (verse 24). Now, I want you to re-read that verse and substitute “money” with “comfort”
“You cannot serve both God and comfort.” Hmmmm….
That’s what I had been doing. I had been serving comfort OVER God, and that’s what was causing me to focus so much on the things that I didn’t have access to at Training Camp.
Was I 100% uncomfortable with sleeping in a tent for 11 days in a place that I had never been before…?? Absolutely. But I have no doubt in my mind that God placed me into this situation so that I would realize that He is my All in All. Comfort is so not worth compromising our relationship and reliance on the Lord. He is the prize, the goal, our rock, our portion, our strength, and the ULTIMATE source of comfort. Rather than seeking worldly comfort (even if it’s GOOD things, like family), we should ultimately be yearning for the Lord.
It is SO IMPORTANT that we don’t lose sight of the real reason why we’re living and breathing. When the things in our lives are coming before God, you’ll quickly discover that He is the only one who can fulfill you. I discovered VERY quickly that I would need to rely on the Lord in order to make it through 11 days in the woods.
Worldly comfort will always fail you. When we lose sight of the goal – aka Jesus, aka furthering the Kingdom of God, aka fixing our eyes on the Lord and serving Him in all things – life becomes empty and worthless.
My life should be about glorifying God with my every breath and movement. I am not the hero of my story. I’m not the star, and I’m not the center. He is. I want to make my life ALL about Jesus, and NOT about me; not about my comfort either. My sole purpose is serving the Lord and walking in all that it means to be a Child of God. That’s your purpose too.
“God is the highest good of the reasonable creature. The enjoyment of him is our proper; and is the only happiness with which our souls can be satisfied. To go to heaven, fully to enjoy God, is infinitely better than the most pleasant accommodations here. Better than fathers and mothers, husbands, wives, or children, or the company of any, or all earthly friends. These are but shadows; but the enjoyment of God is the substance. These are but scattered beams; but God is the sun. These are but streams; but God is the fountain. These are but drops, but God is the ocean.” – Jonathan Edwards
Stay tuned for a few more blogs about what happened during Training Camp! As always, thank you, thank you, thank you, for taking time to read these words and invest in my story. I’m super grateful.
-Lyss
