Hi friends.
We’re in Thailand over here.
This was one of the most wild, yet easiest ‘yes’s I’ve ever said.
One week before I jumped on a plane, Jesus gave me a dream. In this dream, a family member (from my fam of twelve) asked me to go on a trip with them for one month. The kicker though was they were leaving in a week. So I had to decide right then.
I woke up the next morning and was presented the opportunity to lead a World Race Semesters 18-22 year old team (of twelve people) to Thailand. For one month. I would be leaving in a week.
Ok, Jesus.
The few days before I left I was scrambling to pack, say goodbyes to my community, and do all the things one needs to do before travelling halfway across the globe for a month. Chaotic goodness. A special sort of peace in all of it. I said it over and over those few days- it feels crazy in the world’s perspective. Rash, maybe illogical. It feels crazy, yet somehow it’s not. It’s normal. This upside-down life with Jesus may not make sense but there is sweet assurance that in giving Him this “yes” I am exactly where He wants me.
Truly no place I’d rather be.
Two and a half weeks ago, I stepped into leading eleven gals and one guy with my co-lead Joe. I spend my days stewarding stories, opening my heart, praying over their hearts, managing team finances, jumping with them into ministry, and equipping them to do things the Lord’s given them such purpose in. I feel the weight of this responsibility. More than anything I am learning how greatly I need the Father. I keep coming back to dependence.
What a honestly beautiful place to be, knowing that aside from the Spirit of the living God inside of me I fall on my face. What a gently sweet heart space, to be able to delight in His sufficiency when I lack. I truly love leading this team with all my heart. It brings me so much life. But I cannot do it on my own.
This I am quickly learning- dependency leads to thankfulness and gratitude over burnout.
I don’t have the words or the wisdom to share in the face of hard and deep questions. He is Truth.
My strength runs low. He guides me to a place of overflow in Him.
I don’t feel ready or equipped. He reminds me that taking on this responsibility came from and continues through a surrendered “yes” to Him. My primary role here is to walk out my own life in the Kingdom of God and invite others into the same.
He satisfies my every need. He is enough. My freedom and power rests solely in Him. He is grace and life and love and truth.
This is one of the sweetest and most growing seasons all in one. I have seen Holy Spirit at work in powerful ways. God is doing good things here. I watch my team become a family more every day. I laugh a lot. I have met world changers. I am stretched in the best of ways because I know in all of it the Lord is so near.
My heart posture in this season is awe and wonder. Some days I am weary and worn thin, but the kindness of my Father’s heart always brings me back to Him. Running, dancing, and dwelling in freedom with my people. Ever grateful for a seat at His table.
