Being on the race, I knew I would get homesick. It felt like one of those inevitable things. I always pictured these huge crying breakdowns, wailing, and wishing I was back home. I mean right? In the movies that’s how it is: they can’t stand where they are, and have a strong longing to be back home. I felt as if I kept waiting for this pinical moment to happen. So now 8 can say I’m not homesick since this hasn’t happened yet.
What I didn’t realize is what homesickness really looks like. To me, it’s wishing I was walking through the target dollar section, wishing I was driving over Moore’s Lane in my hometown, wishing I was cooking with my dad, wishing I was at Christ Community on a Sunday morning, or wishing I was drinking coffee on the porch at Frothy Monkey. It’s triggers that make me crave to be doing something so little back at home. When things like this come up it makes me really think- dang. I didn’t realize how much happiness these moments brought me and how much I took this for granted.
When coming on the race, I was fully aware how hard December was going to be. Not being home for my birthday, Christmas, or New Years (and hey let’s add thanksgiving in there too because that wasn’t easy either). Going off what I was saying earlier, it’s been such a different type of hard than I thought it would be.
Our collective group of leaders keep telling us to bring in things for the holidays- share our family traditions! But. As I’m being on the race I’m finding out that my normal Christmas is not going to look normal to me this year. I’m not headed to Wisconsin to see my moms side of the family. Not gonna see snow. Nomg going to my favorite restaurant for my birthday. Not going to buca di beppo with 5 other family friends and playing white elephant after church on the 24th. Not gonna wake up with mom and sis on the 25th and have the morning to share together. Not gonna fly on the 25th with sis to see my dad. Not spending the new year watching fireworks in NOLA.
There is going to be a lot of nots this season. That is really hard. It’s really hard to know that those same things are going to happen without me, too.
But, as a team we are fighting for each other. We are being obedient and listening to what the Lord is calling us to do!
This years holidays are holidays with a twist! Twist of 8 peoples traditions in one!!! We are finding and making home this holiday season. We are making Christmas cookies because that’s what Gabby’s family does back home. We are caroling because that’s what Morgan’s family does back home. We are watching a (cheesy romantic) Christmas movie because that’s going to bring Cheree joy. We are sleeping on the floor in a fort on the 24th. We are doing secret Santa so we can have a present to open on Christmas morning. We are doing advent every night because that’s what Chessie does back home.
We are making this year our own because it’s new to us all.
This will be the hardest holiday season so far.. but also maybe the most memorable. I’m spending this holiday season with 7 of my best friends in Chile worshiping this birth of the coolest God out there. Now this beats any amount of home sickness I have.
