If you haven’t heard this already from a previous world Racer, let me be the first one to tell you, this trip I am on is not a VACATION!
Yes, I get to see cool things around the world.
Yes, I get to see a new country every month.
Yes, I get to make new friends every month.
Yes, there were months when I got a day off from ministry to do adventure.
And yes, I get to try new food every month.
But, it is far from a vacation. Because 11 countries in 11 months also means
missing celebrating my favorite holiday at home: Christmas!
It means not seeing my family every day.
It means missing celebrating my sibling’s birthdays.
It means missing cheering on my sisters during their track meets.
It means having to say goodbye to people every month etc..
On the Race, there are days when I am both physically and emotionally exhausted.
There are days when I just want to lock myself in a room and not talk to anybody but can’t because I am surrounded by people 24/7.
There are days where I want to call my parents and cry because I am sick of seeing the brokenness around me and sick of feeling inadequate to do anything about it.
There are days where I don’t feel like doing ministry.
On month three of my trip, when I was volunteering at a refugee camp in Greece, I told my team leader I wanted to go home!
I told her I felt like I wasn’t doing enough.
I told her, if I can’t really see the change I was making, why am I even here?
At the refugee camp, we saw people die.
We saw people get in fights almost every day.
We saw kids play with trash because they didn’t have a proper toy.
But, more than anything we saw how truly broken our world is.
You see I had this terrible mindset where I wanted to fix everyone’s problems.
It is a terrible mindset because I am not meant to fix people. That’s God’s job.
Every month I see a need I feel like I lose a piece of my heart.
When I was in South Africa, one afternoon after spending time in a very poor area of a neighborhood I came home and told my teammates I don’t understand why God has given me a desire to be a social worker.
I told them if everything I see and experience brings me pain and breaks me down, how am I supposed to function and make decisions in the future?
All this to say serving people and God is not always easy. In fact, it is pretty difficult.
But, is He worth it for you?
Is God worth you sacrificing your time?
Is He worth you putting your “normal” life on hold for a year?
Is He worth it for you to give up everything you own if He asks you to?
I am glad I made the decision to stay on the Race even when I felt like giving up. Because, I have seen God work through so many amazing things.
I have seen Him change people’s lives.
I have gained a new perspective in so many areas of my life.
As followers of Christ, every day is an opportunity for us to love others the we have been loved.
Everyday is an opportunity to serve others.
Everyday, we have an opportunity to make someone feel heard.
Everyday, we have an opportunity to stop and talk to that homeless person we pass on the street.
Everyday, we have an opportunity to make people feel they matter.
Sometimes, we are so quick to put our judgement cap on, but we are not as quick to love and support those around us.
I encourage you all to see people through God’s eyes. You don’t need to travel the world to ministry or help people. There are enough needs right where you are.
