Dear Joel,
Tomorrow I have to say goodbye to you. Tomorrow a piece of my heart will be left behind in a big blue home on the corner of road 95. For the past three weeks I have walked past the corner store, turned right at the plants and welcomed by Roy the guard to your home. I climb up the steep stairwell to the sound of laughter and find myself surrounded by a sea of kids clapping in excitement. All of a sudden this big blue home is transformed into a magical kingdom of God’s abundant joy. Your brothers are sprawled out all over the floor, squealing with smiles so big that it would be impossible to not have my own physical reaction. I reach down to sit and greet each kid, but the news has spread that we are back and I hear a long energetic “Reegggggaaaaannnn”. You keep singing it in your adorable Indian accent until I come to your room and find you wide eyed and spinning around on the ground out of pure delight.
I reach down to comfort you with a big hug and wrap your little legs around me so that we can finally be together after another full day without each others company. This is the slightest glimpse of what it must feel like to be a parent. My heart is so full thinking about returning back to your big blue home each day and hearing about your school day. Your curiosity about me and the world brings an insurmountable life and light to my soul. Seeing a picture of you brings tears to my face. How has it only been 3 weeks and I can feel such protection and love for you? Joel it is your spirit. I don’t know your past, I don’t know what you have endured but I know it was hard. I don’t know what has caused your paralyzation from the waist down, or your spine to be completely twisted, or why you are an orphan, but none of that has stopped you from living your life with your heart wide open. This is what I love about you.
You are strong. You don’t care that your body is different. You don’t let your circumstances determine who you become. You ask for help when you need it. You work hard in school and get mad at me when I interrupt you doing homework. You ask questions and even if you know the answer you act surprised and interested. You listen when people speak. You care about knowing who people are, even if it just their name. You are an example and a friend to all the boys in your home. Joel you are gong to do such great things. I have no doubt in your ability to become anyone you want to be. Keep your eyes on God and the gifts he has given you and they will take you far. Be proud of how God made you and let your past fuel you into your future. I know you are in good hands at your big blue home but I cannot wait to see you soar one day. Please know that you have someone praying for you every single day for the rest of your life. Please know that even though I can’t be physically with you I am there spiritually. Please know that I will always be following your journey and if you need something I will do my best to help you get it. This is how much I believe in you, this is how much you have impacted me these past three weeks.
Thank you for being you. Thank you for reminding me that no matter what life circumstances look like we still have the ability to live in God’s joy. At some point there will be people who expect less of you because your body is different, but show them wrong. Give them all you have got because you have so much to offer. I have seen this in my time with you and I am touched everyday by your compassionate spirit. Joel you have been my inspiration this month and now I must leave you with a piece of my heart with you.
Love,
Reeegggggaaaannn
