Ministry has varied so far on the race. I have learned that it shouldn’t be scheduled — that I should be living each moment as a chance to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Since the beginning of my race, I’ve had a feeling that the Lord was going to use my story to impact the lives of others. I was not sure how He would do it, and I hope that He uses it some more, but here it is — how God used my story to not only comfort a grieving family, but to impact my life as well.
Our Shepherd told us that we were going to make a house visit to one of the homesteads in the community of our care point. Apparently a young girl, fifteen years old, had been ill and had just died a few nights before. My whole team was willing to go. We weren’t sure exactly how we could help, we had never even met her, but I think we all felt the Lord’s prodding in our hearts. We arrived at the homestead and were ushered into one of the various buildings on site. It was a single room cement building. There were a bunch of straw mats strewn on the floor and a mattress in the corner. About eight or ten women, the family of the girl, were in there, sitting. We sat down and were introduced as a team with AIM and were there to offer words of comfort. I saw the look in there eyes, that look of despair and pain. The look that questions whether or not you’ll be able to continue on and push through, and I understood.
Ten years ago this April I lost my sister, Sarah. I felt that despairing pain and that reality that life would never be the same again. I felt a deep sadness in my heart and struggled with the thought that God is not good and He does not answer prayer, and to be completely honest, I still struggle with it. So sitting in that little cement house, I understood their pain. The night before, we had spent some time looking up verses that could be of some comfort. My mind immediately went to Lamentations 3:21-24, 31-32. “But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. ‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul, ‘therefore I will hope in him’. For the Lord will not cast off forever, but though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love.” These are words that have brought so much comfort to my heart throughout the years since Sarah’s death. I had the honor of reading them aloud to this family and explaining the significance that they have had in my life.
Later, as we were walking back from their homestead, we were talking about the craziness of that whole situation; how ten years later, I would be sitting in a little house in Swaziland, sharing with a grieving family words that I have found to be such a great comfort. The Bible tells us to “weep with those who weep”. In that moment, the Lord gave me a heart for them, because I could truly say, “I know what you are going through”. I was and am continually reminded that the Lord uses our past hurts and pains. He was able to use my situation to connect me to a family that I had literally never met, yet I was able to mourn with them and weep with them in the midst of their pain. I believe that this is one of the reasons why God gives us our stories. It isn’t so we can sit on them and keep them to ourselves. Our stories can have a major impact if only we would share them with others and let them be used by God, and through it, He will bring healing to others, and to our own cracked hearts as well. That’s what I want for my race and for the rest of my life. I want my story to be a testament to the goodness of the Lord. I hope and pray that He uses it to draw people into His warm embrace.
