Weird title but hey, so am I.
I’m sitting here in my room thinking about all the things my life is about to be like. There are so many great adventures that I know I’m going to have, but I have this constant darkness lurking in the back of my mind.
Doubt.
I found myself crying at work yesterday because I was so overwhelmed with the thought of raising $17,000. I’ve done mission work for so long now. What if no one wants to give to me anymore? What if people get annoyed with my constant updates about the race. What if I don’t raise the money in time?
What if.. What if.. What if..
By the way, this is nothing new for me. This is how my brain works.
I started taking the fundraising course that we all have to do and found things that I really needed to hear.
Mark 5:46 “Jesus told them,”Don’t be afraid; just believe.”
This tiny verse at the very moment I read it, gave me so much peace.
God wants me to go on this race. He called me to be a missionary a long time ago. Why doubt the God who brings dead back to life. Why do I doubt the God who knows how many hairs are on my head? Why am I doubting the same God who created the universe?
I believe in God. I believe that he can do anything. He will raise these funds. He will get me to where he wants me to go.
so I guess I just have to keep telling myself,
don’t be afraid.
just believe.
