I just want to start with saying be careful what you ask God for because He will come through at responding for your requests. I recently completed a study on Philippians where I was convicted with the question, How do I die to myself? What does that look like for me?” That has been my prayer; Lord, show me how I live for You and die to myself. Give me a heart of humility; show me what that looks like.
Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion,then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.
Philippians 2:1-4 (NIV)
This month in Thailand we, as a squad, have the opportunity to pick our own ministries! After prayerful consideration we came together to discuss what the Lord put on our hearts, our gifts, passions and interests in different ministry opportunities. I had a whole page of my journal with ideas and passions of mine. I was super excited to dive into them. I wanted to partner with the base here in Chiang Mai and learn how my skills in hospitality could be used in missions. Another idea I had was to pursue women’s ministries more maybe with vocational training for sustainability, support for abused or trafficked women or discipleship with my background in the Beauty for Ashes ministry. I was thinking it was a going to be a great month serving in areas I know and love. However, God asked me to take a risk, get uncomfortable and take up my cross to follow His calling.
We came together as a team to discuss our thoughts, ideas and callings. The only request for the base was to have a team of six to help out at the Hope Home, a foster home for disabled children. When it came to point were everyone shared and ministries were forming, I couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that came over me. There was one spot left that needed to be filled for the team partnering with the Hope Home. I didn’t really consider this team as an option. I don’t think I have a huge gift in children’s ministry; I have seen others with kids and think they are way better at interacting with them. I pushed the thought away, making excuses, thinking someone else would do a way better job serving the staff there. However, during our whole meeting I kept trying to ignore the little voice, “commit child, step up, fill the needed spot.” In that moment I knew God was providing that opportunity to die to myself. I needed to give up my desires and my thoughts of what the perfect ministry would be for me and submit to my Father’s calling. After this long, internal struggle I humbled myself and voiced my commitment to this ministry. I am not proud of how long it took me to obey the Lord’s calling but He has grace upon grace.
“For me to live is Christ and to die is gain.”
Philippians 1:21 (NIV)
After making this decision, I felt lighter and freer and more excited about this opportunity than ever before! God provided me with a reassurance of this is where He wants me to be this month and I am expectant for an awesome experience. I asked God for more risk, more un-comfort and growth. He heard my cry and is not disappointing. I am part of a great team and beyond excited to see how God uses us to serve the staff and children at Hope Home. All the prayers would be appreciated as we learn how to best support and bless all involved in this great ministry!
Cultural Fact: Thai people are not fans of physical touch. For greetings they bow slightly and sometimes put their palms together. The bigger the bow the more respect given. It’s disrespectful to touch another person’s head or pat a child on the head. Feet are dirty and should never be used to point and always kept down/tucked away.
oh and street bugs anyone? Great protein…
