Pursuing Balance
Blogging and documenting this time on the field this time around has been very hard for me. Partially because WiFi is hard to obtain where we have been on the race up until this point (more of the last 4 months… we found WiFi pretty well the first 2 months in Thailand before traveling to Malaysia), and partially because my mindset in ministry has shifted so much and I sometimes have a hard time thinking past where the Lord has placed me.
WiFi or internet is almost non existent here. It truly is a miracle when it flows smoothly, or even at all. Our squad has had a hard time finding ways to share our stories and share in the testimonies the Lord has blessed us with to share of what he is doing here. It has been hard to desire to share testimonies of the Lords faithfulness and then not be able to connect well enough to WiFi… and then by the time you try again another time you now have even more stores to share. It just keeps adding up.
Where we have been in India, in one village there is only one WiFi router we can find in town, and in the other village we went to there was none to be found. Many people bought hot spots because of this issue. I have an international plan, which is amazing and allows me to connect to the internet when needed… if it has good enough signal. It hasn’t always had the best signal.
Honestly I am laying in my bed right now y’all and I am laughing because our squad has tried some of the weirdest things to be able to get internet to reach back to the states in this season and it has just been such a funny journey these past few months.
Another one of my struggles with documenting my time on the field this time around is that I have observed my mind shift from “I need to remember this forever and take all the pictures” into simply staying present and diving deep where I am. I genuinely sometimes forget to turn my phone on. The only reason I even have pictures to post on social media sometimes is because people take pictures of me or for me and I then post them.
I am overjoyed my mindset has shifted to see this life as a gift and blessing but mainly just simply my life… because it is! But in this, I often forget to share in the fruit and the simple joy in front of me. I am learning there is so much of a balance to this!
Desiring to stay present but also desiring to share in the testimony and invite people in! All while, trying to find time to do it all well.
I often find my days are fuller than they should be by no ones fault, just simply because this season has held much as I balance daily ministry, Squad Leader duties, my personal relationship with the Lord, and more. Daily the Lord calls me to draw close to him and figure out what my day needs to look like. Sometimes I need to add more things to my plate, and more often than not I need to take things off my plate, and sometimes I rework everything and create a new plate. Sometimes I do it well and other times I do it poorly. I am human and therefore, I give myself grace.
I am desiring to pursue the balance. To pursue letting my feet soak deep into the sand without distraction, but also setting aside time to share in the Lords work here more through story and testimony.
This is a huge goal of mine. To share in the Lords work so well, that people can catch the vision and fire without having to be here in person.
I am such a “be where your feet are” type of person that it sometimes is hard for me to even remember that life truly is happening outside of India right now.
Balance. Pursuing balance.
As my mindset shifts to see overseas missions as my comfort, my norm, and truly my life, I am thankful my mind is in the state it is in. I am pursuing the balance of keeping my mindset growing in the direction it is of simplicity and normalcy here, and continually keeping my eyes open to what the Lord is doing and where a testimony can be shared.
The Lord desires to be praised and to receive the Glory daily… and I desire to be a mouthpiece for that.
With that all being said, I will be sharing many blogs very close together regarding my time in India these past three months because I have steady signal right now and I want to share in the Lords goodness with you all! Buckle up! It’s go time and I am so excited to share in this season and journey with you deeper still.
If you want to follow my Instagram, I post briefly there pretty often. The username is Courtneyraejack.
Thank you for reading as always! I am so blessed by your support and love!
